Mar
13
Exclusive: Secret Kanye West Document Revealed
Recently, Kanye West has come under fire once again from the media for his seemingly ignorant and often bizarre comments, this time during a performance of his song “Amazing” on VH1’s “Storytellers” concert series.
I, Armand Assante’s Left Ventricle, have managed to exclusively secure the one and only copy of a very personal private document of Kanye West’s.
Enjoy.
(Click to enlarge.)
I was also able to snag a quick word with the artist after he finished his set. When asked if there’s anything else he thinks are amazing, West said, “Penises. ” Asked to repeat himself, West said, “Uh…vaginas. I said vaginas. Love ‘em.”
I love that letter. I am planning to have it framed and hung in my bathroom wall next to my “Don’t swim in my toilet, ’cause who the fuck does that?!” sign.
FYI, anyone having trouble seeing the small print at the top, click on the document and click again… it will make the document bigger. It’s worth it.
I meant to comment last week, and then I didn’t, anywho. Funny and wrong did you hear he has beef with Radiohead?
Radiohead is awesome. They’ve snubbed both Miley Cyrus AND Kanye West in the last couple of weeks.
Did he just try to argue that not reading makes him smarter? I am not sure because as someone who reads and gets my information from credible (or at least credited) sources, I am too stupid to understand.
In his defense, everybody finds silk sheets on the ball bag amazing, particularly after a valentines day manscaping. Yeah, you laugh, but you know it’s true.
Yeah, I’ve never heard someone use “I don’t read” to try to make themselves sound SMARTER.
how can you like beavis but not butthead? that like saying you like oral but hate intercourse
What’s “intercourse”?
Wait, is he talking about lady sandals or those God awful sandals you guys dig out from the backs of your closets every freakin summer? You know, the ones with the velcro straps. Aint nothing amazing about those things.
I think Kanye likes the man-sandals. Mandals.
I’m impressed he can write a cursive ‘z’ in the word amazing. Just bow first, ask questions later.
(Don’t bow to long, gentlemen…he might sneak up on you from behind)
I…uh…I mean KANYE, paid really good attention to cursive in school.
The best thing about that clip is that he doesn’t even specify that he’s talking about OJ’s football career. All he says is “when he did what he did, was that not amazing?” Personally I think he’s talking about the murders.
The funniest part of the show, however, is when he goes on a rant about how upset he is that he doesn’t have the privilege and pleasure of watching himself perform on stage. Stay humble, Kanye…
I disagree about what he was referring to with OJ. I’m convinced its about his golf score.
Man am I glad that this fucking douchebag has never seen a dime of my money.
I don’t think he chooses not to read, I think he can’t read.
I hate him with the white hot intensity of a thousand suns. Except wait….I don’t THINK about him that much, in fact I don’t think about him at all. Except to think he’s fucking retarded and if that’s a US celebrity in this day and age I’m moving to fucking Iceland or something.
Yes yes Radiohead is awesome. Collectively one of their members has more brain cells in their toenail than Kanye has in his entire body. I can’t stand his face. It makes me homicidal.
I wanna kick it with a golf shoe. Kanye could be singularly responsible for making a criminal out of Amy and sending her to be someone’s bitch because let’s face it, I’m too pretty for prison.
Looks like part of that list got cut off at the bottom. I can barely make it out but it says autotune
Cuz without it he would sound like a dying cat (although he’s not a far cry from that right now anyways)