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New Michael Phelps Sponsorship Opportunities

By: Bobby Finstock on 02/2/09 @ 7:00 am

If you haven’t heard pictures of Olympic golden boy Michael Phelps have surfaced of him taking some hits from the bong post Olympics. I think most people would agree that a little pot smoking isn’t a big deal but marketers have been quick to say that this could hurt his massive endorsement deals. They couldn’t be any more wrong, in fact I think this opens the door for him. Here are four potential sponsorship opportunities available for him.


Goldenseal- If you examine the pictures you can tell that it isn’t his first rodeo. He is taking it in like the Olympic champ that he is. But with the amount of drug tests this guy goes through he has had to have a little help. That is why Goldenseal is the perfect sponsorship opportunity for him. What else says, “Hey I like to have a little fun but I need to keep my job?”


Funyuns- So much has been made about the infamous Phelps calorie intake. Now we know it wasn’t just about his training intensity. You know that between the training, smoking, and eating there is one thing he constantly craves, Funyuns. The only food made for stoners by stoners, now they have a new cover boy.


Phish- Sure the band reunited and their shows shouldn’t have a problem selling out. But with a younger generation possibly unfamiliar with them why not use Phelps to help introduce them to each other. We know they all have something in common… cough, cough.


Hemp swimming trunks- There is a lot of debate about the technology in swimming and how the suits have helped cut down time so much. This is a chance for Phelps to really show that he doesn’t need the technology and help further the cause. (Insert your own, “if he loses he can smoke always smoke his trunk” jokes here.)

See Michael there is so much for you out there still.

What do you think about the whole Phelps getting caught smoking situation?

About the author

Bobby Finstock

Finstock is founder of Pointlessbanter.net. He is known for his encyclopedia like knowledge on the life and times of Scott Baio. In the future he hopes to write again under his own name in order to impress the ladies and build his celebrity to the levels of other failed internet writers.

21 Responses to “New Michael Phelps Sponsorship Opportunities”

  1. Meghan says:

    I have never experienced the pot smoking urges that have required a Funyuns bag, pork rinds or the like.

    I have, however seen Trey Anastasio higher than a kite on DVD commentary…and it kind of made me want to get high in a farmhouse and drink tequila mixed with lemonade.

    The Phelps star is fading…and fast. Time for infomercials with Mr. T.

  2. Vince says:

    He could also become the spokes person for NORML. They could show him swimming laps and when he gets done he jumps out of the water and does a bong hit and says “I’ve won 8 gold medals and celebrated with 8 bong hits, big whoop, wanna fight about it.”

    BTW, best super bowl commercial hands down was the Cash4Gold commercial. Hammer and Mcmahon are the new pwerhouse in advertising!

  3. Tarah says:

    Ok – this one made me laugh. (-: However, along with Funyuns, I might want to add Munchos to the list….

  4. mydailylist says:

    HOLY SHIT! They make Funyuns with wasabi? How come I’ve never seen this. Is a regional thing? Shit.

  5. LightGrenade says:

    I had to quit smoking pot because its “illegal” and I’m supposed to be “professional” and hold down a “job”. Fuck Michael Phelps. If I can’t “smoke” pot, then he shouldn’t either. ” “. He should get sponsored by Fun-Dip, Taco Bell, Jack In The Box 2 tacos for a dollar, and Barack Obama.

  6. Erin Happycamper says:

    you forgot he can now be a sponsor for “high times”

    maybe we can put him in the calendar edition, lol

  7. Jeremy says:

    They stripped a medal off one of our Snowboarders years ago in the olympics for pot. There are a couple of problems here:
    1-show me a snowboarder that doesn’t toke.
    2-I really don’t think pot is a performance enhancer.
    3-Why don’t we reward these guys double for being able to do anything when high. Normally the most energy spent is arguing about who’s turn it is to pack the next bowl.
    4-If pot’s so great for athletes,why isn’t Snoop Dog a gold medal sprinter?

  8. James says:

    Why wont Phelps go away??????????

  9. I don’t want Michael Phelps to go away. I want Obama to issue his own statement of support. “Hey, I smoked it, inhaled it, and got elected to be President of the USA. Leave the dude alone.” Now that would be something worthwhile to accomplish in the first 100 days.

  10. Melinda says:

    Bong hits for Olympians!

  11. William Christians says:

    From what I hear this is just a publicity stunt as Phelps will be appearing in Canadian rock-band Nickelback’s video for their soon-to-be-released song This Afternoon from their new album Dark Horse.

    “Looking like another Bob Marley day, Hittin’ from the bong like a diesel train….”

  12. I think they should just combine endorsements and have a special Eric Phelps Wheaties box with a Hackeysack prize inside.

  13. coffee says:

    there are a lot more productive issues the media could be covering than Michael Phelps smoking pot a year ago

  14. Hoeanna says:

    No question…blow pops. Years 2 blow pops a day gave his mouth the ability to suck start a harley!

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