I have been writing blogs in one form or another for over four years now. (I know get a life right?) Every year when Christmas comes around I bitch about the same thing… charity. Personally I am a charitable guy, I give money to the things I want to support and on occasion am more than willing to donate my time to help out. What I don’t like is being constantly solicited wherever I go during the holiday season; it makes me very uncomfortable and even a little bitter towards charity. (Screw Operation Smile by the way, facial deformities build character.)
Honestly though I sometimes feel bad because it is like I am saying their charity isn’t worth it by walking away or even worse maybe I am coming off as cheap or cold hearted. (My personal image is more important than your charity.) However I’ve been able to get over it though and function in society because the people soliciting are usually somewhat socially inept or not very good at pulling on my heartstrings.
This year though charities have gotten smarter. Yesterday I went grocery shopping and on my way into the store noticed a charity table ran by two really hot girls. And these women were pure sharks, it was amazing to watch them work. Men by themselves stood no chance against these two ladies as they just cut them down with a smile and a touch to the arm. I have to say the touching of the arm was a brilliant move because the guys stop for the smile and the girl but they donate because of the touch. The touch builds a level of comfort and the false hope that the lady might actually like them.
The touch though wasn’t the most genius move that they used. When couples came through the always approached the woman first. If the woman rejected them they immediately said something to the man like, “Wouldn’t this donation be a great gift for the lady in your life?” This starts the gears grinding in the guys head and he formulates this logic:
Hot girl thinks donation is a good gift… I must make donation to impress hot girl… then go home and kill my wife because she doesn’t like donation… come back and chat up hot girl who will remember me for this large donation that I am about to give.
When the wife/girlfriend starts bitching at him for giving the donation it solidifies the logic in his mind. The men just move forward with the donation while the girlfriend/wife storms out of the store. It is absolutely amazing to watch the sense of satisfaction that appears on the charity reps face when this happens.
This might be the single greatest move that a charity has made ever. Drunken bums in Santa Suits ringing a bell can’t compare to girls wearing a t-shirt and black ass pants. Looks like nobody I know is getting a gift I donated all my shopping money for Christmas to charity.
What do you think about the non-stop soliciting by charities during Christmas time?