The Match.com Files: I need $50 to make you holler I get paid to do the wild thing

After my first round of dates I decided to take some time off, reflect, and consider important questions like what is the exact ingredient difference between Mayonnaise and Miracle Whip? After giving up I decided to get back on the dating wagon. I scheduled date number 4, went on a second date with date number [...]

The Lobotomy of America is Complete

So, I was watching the American Music Awards, just for the sheer entertainment value, to see the lunacy and unoriginality that is the music industry nowadays and…
Hey, everyone! It’s Scott Weiland!

Fresh from his fourteenth stint in rehab, out there presenting the next performer for the American Music Awards. He looks decently put together, sober, I’m [...]

If you are an adult and excited to see Twilight you are an idiot

(Today I got into a little tiff with a few friends on Facebook when they were posting how excited they were to see the new Twilight movie. I basically feel that if you are over the age of 20 and are getting excited about seeing Twilight you are an idiot. People got upset, things were said, and deletions were immaturely made. So I invited one of the pro Twilight people to come here and state her case in a point/counter point style.)

Winter Sucks and So Do You

I was told I have been “cranky” lately, which usually leads to “Matt, you need to get laid” amongst other statements regarding forms of stress relief that people abide by. Believe me, this dude abides.
But, I have solid reasoning as to why I am as miserable as a male dog recently severed from his clockweights.

Winter [...]

Why I still love Survivor

I have watched every single season of Survivor except for the second one. It is easily my favorite reality show and I am not ashamed to admit it. Do I like it because of the man versus nature element? Eh, I don’t care about. How about the strategy and conniving? Not really, the game is [...]

Masturbation Conversation: Dating Graveyard or Dating Gold?

I got a phone call from a good friend of mine the other day. Said friend, whom I will call “Tenacious D” or T.D. for short, due to his striking resemblance to Kyle Gass, is what I would call a perpetual dater.

He’s kind of like Finstock on here, really, minus the brown shoes and fascination [...]