While I think I have slightly progressive views when it comes to a lot of things one belief that I don’t want to challenge or change is one that deals with beauty queens. Beauty queens need to be on a totally unreachable level of perfection that can only be obtained by scotch taping your breasts and putting Vaseline on your teeth. What has happened in this country to degrade the status of beauty queens so much?
First it was the Vanessa Williams Penthouse scandal, and then we had acts of bribery, sex scandals, and other breakdowns in morals. Then this video surfaced and we have this obscene notion that beauty pageant contestants are partially retarded.
I thought the nail in the coffin to the greatness of beauty queens was when Sarah Palin was nominated to be the running mate for John McCain and was destroyed by the press. But it turns out it wasn’t as bad as Miss Teen Louisiana getting arrested for a failed dine and ditch because she left her purse behind in the restaurant she was skipping out on. Not only did her dumb ass leave the purse behind but she also had some weed in there. Whoops…
At least good old Lindsey made sure to smile properly and pose for her mug shot. Not forgetting her years of training, she was a trooper and probably did her overbearing mother proud. (And probably her sexually ambiguous male coach.)
What happened to the Southern Belle that was disgustingly good looking and wanted to bring about world peace? You know the girl that could twirl a baton and then make you believe that she really loved animals? Is that era over?
I guess we are going to have to just lower our standards and chase after girls in the Suicide Girl mode… Maybe it is about time. Our hopes won’t be dashed when they get caught with weed and we secretly hope for a sex scandal.
Now who wants cupcakes?