The worst thing ever happened on Friday. OJ Simpson was found guilty in his trial in Las Vegas. Personally I am a big fan of vengeance, comeuppance, and people getting what they deserve but not in OJ’s case. In fact OJ going to jail is such a dream crusher that it saddens me.
You see OJ represented the fact that if you have money and fame you could do whatever the hell you wanted. Murder, armed robbery, threats, screwing former Playboy models, and golfing while looking for the “real killers” in a mocking way that upsets all the families of the people you killed are all things that are fun to get away with. But now we see that no matter what you do it will eventually catch up with you, which sucks.
I liked to know that if I ever got rich and famous that I could get away with anything. Having that taken away from me sullies the dream of getting loaded and living above the law. My hit list of everyone that has ever wronged me (and that dick from the delivery service that didn’t bring my 2 liter mountain dew on Saturday is now on the top of the list) is now gone, tossed because I know I can’t just buy my way out of it.
Forget the financial crisis, the war in Iraq, and the general down spin our country is facing. This is the most important thing we need to be worried about, without a sociopath celebrity running around responsible with fueling our idea that the rich and powerful can get away with anything what are we going to do? We need someone to take this baton from OJ and run with it.
Here are a few people I would like to see step up and represent.
We get to bust a few different glass ceilings here with it being a woman and a lesbian. This would be amazing because it would be flipping the exploitation of power onto a whole new demographic which is good. Although when she returns to “The View” and murders Elizabeth Hasselbeck and gets away with it I don’t see a major backlash.
He needs to jumpstart his career and being a wisecracking murderer that got away with it might just do that. Or a new standup special that returns him to the world of adult humor. Actually I would rather just have him knock someone off, his sarcastic interviews about looking for the “real killers” would potentially be hilarious.
He already shot someone in the face and got away with it. Why not step it up a notch? We need to be able to keep tabs on him after this administration is over. What better way would that be than watching him get out of a murder trial. I am thinking the murder of a transvestite hooker.
From the age standpoint and the generational standpoint there is no better pick. Plus a little tarnish to her image will be a good thing. Well I should say additional tarnish besides lame cell phone picks with her attempting to act slutty. We need a real reason to dislike her. It would be great to be able to fear and respect someone that weighs less than 80 pounds.
Who do you think should replace OJ as the celebrity killer at large?