Jason Friedberg Must Die
I know what you’re all thinking: “Jason who? Never heard of him, he has no impact on me.” Oh but you’re so, so wrong. You see, Jason Friedberg is almost singlehandedly (along with fellow director Uwe Boll) dumbing down civilization as we know it, one horrible, horrible “spoof” movie at a time.
That’s right, Jason Friedberg is the douchebag that writes and directs all of those horrible “spoof” films that have been coming out over the past three years. Now, I put “spoof” in parentheses because what this asshat does can only very loosely be defined as such. A truly great spoof movie takes on a genre of films and lampoons it, exaggerating aspects of the genre to create comedy. Some of the classics of the spoof genre:
- Airplane
- The Naked Gun
- Scary Movie 1 (which I must begrudgingly disclose that Friedberg helped write)
What The Great Satan, um, I mean Jason Friedberg, increasingly does is simply make a hodge-podge of a movie, taking dozens of genres and making really, REALLY lame jokes out of them. His directorial debut, Date Movie, at least attempted to hang together as a cohesive spoof film, but it’s been all downhill from there. I am convinced at this point that he’s not even writing scripts for this schlock anymore, but just making shit up as he goes, a theory that seems to be proved by the fact that he’s released two of these gems in 2008 alone: Meet the Spartans and Disaster Movie.
And perhaps the most mind-boggling aspect of the whole thing is that these films actually make money! To date, Friedberg’s films have grossed over $140 million domestically!! WTF America? You’re kidding me right? So, it’s simple really, in order to save this great nation from utter destruction, Jason Friedberg must die. If you’re with me, please visit the following site:
www.jasonfriedberghauntsmydreams.edu
PS: If you were dumb enough to click on the link, chances are pretty good you’ve seen Friedberg’s work and love it.
Here is a list of Friedberg’s “work” to date.
Date Movie (2006)
IMDB.com User Rating: 2.6/10
Epic Movie (2007)
IMDB.com User Rating: 2.2/10 (#69 on the worst 100 movie list)
Meet the Spartans (2008)
IMDB.com User Rating: 2.4/10
Disaster Movie (2008)
On 09/9/08 at 10:06 am
sarah said:
oh man, totally with you on this one.
On 09/9/08 at 10:15 am
Will said:
I can very proudly say that I have not seen one of these movies.
On 09/9/08 at 10:34 am
SinisterDan said:
If you give me $3000 dollars, I know a guy who can take care of this for you.
I probably shouldn’t have written that down…
On 09/9/08 at 11:26 pm
donkeysosa said:
I’ve got $10. Are you in?
On 09/10/08 at 11:10 am
Vince said:
I’ll chip in $3.50.
I saw about 5 minutes of Date Movie and had to turn it off and have not see or plan to see any of the others.
The last movie I saw that was like this that I didn’t mind watching was Not another Teen Movie. It had somewhat of a plot but I was mostly interested in it because of all the boobies they showed.
On 09/10/08 at 10:47 pm
donkeysosa said:
I agree on Teen Movie. It was halfway decent. The first Scary Movie is the last spoof that made me laugh a TON
On 09/9/08 at 11:06 am
Jacky said:
I just tend to close my eyes and try and find my happy place whenever I see ads for crap like this. If I ever see this Jason guy on the street, I’m shove a lawn gnome up his ass.
On 09/9/08 at 11:27 pm
donkeysosa said:
The commercials give me douche chills
On 09/9/08 at 12:27 pm
Melissa said:
Not only should he fry, but the morons who go see his movies and enable him to make more.
You missed another all-time classic spoof, Pandemonium, but I forgive you for being a youngster and probably never having heard of it let alone watched it.
On 09/9/08 at 11:28 pm
donkeysosa said:
Never heard of that one. What does it spoof?
On 09/10/08 at 11:12 pm
Melissa said:
Ah man, all the horror movies of the ’70s and even has one the Smother’s Brothers in plus Pee Wee Herman when he was still Paul Rubens. Mostly cheerleader killer/camp massacre shows.
link to imdb: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0084464/
Not much there but I got a VHS of the show and it makes me laugh lots, notably the Mr. Tooth Decay killing.
On 09/11/08 at 12:32 am
donkeysosa said:
Thanks for the link!
On 09/9/08 at 5:12 pm
Stephanie said:
I must admit, Date Movie gave me a few laughs….but then Epic Movie came along and everytime I see another movie like it come out, like Disaster Movie, I cringe. They just get worse and worse. What ever happened to originality? Did it die along with James Brown?
On 09/10/08 at 9:38 am
Carolyn said:
Woohoo, never seen a single one of these films either, but know of them. I’ll put another $10 in.
On 09/10/08 at 10:48 pm
donkeysosa said:
OK, so far we’re up to $23.50. Almost there!
On 09/10/08 at 11:13 am
Meghan said:
I’d rather watch 1.5 hours of an emergency broadcast test than any of these pieces of shit.
I’ve not seen a one, and anyone that asked me if I wanted to go see the next one in the theater automatically gets a punch in the groin/left tit.
On 09/10/08 at 10:49 pm
donkeysosa said:
hey, don’t knock Emergency Broadcast until you’ve tried it.
On 09/10/08 at 11:55 am
Fiona said:
My boyfriend made me watch Meet The Spartans. About 15 minutes in he agreed it was tripe soaked in dog shit and turned it off. I’m happy to announce I’ve never had to even look in the general direction of the rest of those train wrecks.
On 09/10/08 at 1:55 pm
matty said:
How can you forget one of the greatest spoof movies of all time? “Kentucky Fried Movie”.
“What is this. This is not a cha-wade. We need total concentwation. Now. Twy again. This time with feeee-ring.”
On 09/10/08 at 10:50 pm
donkeysosa said:
Great point. One of the ORIGINAL spoofs. Oh yeah, and Blazing Saddles is great too
On 09/10/08 at 11:15 pm
Melissa said:
Ack! I can’t believe I forgot Blazing Saddles, I just watched it! Pure genius. Shame it was banned from television for so long because of the racial and ethnic “slurs”.
On 09/10/08 at 5:59 pm
JT said:
I broke up with a girl once because she asked em to take her to see Epic Movie.
On 09/10/08 at 10:51 pm
donkeysosa said:
You sir, are an American Hero.
On 09/11/08 at 12:02 am
Karl Rove said:
I saw both Date Movie and Epic Movie, but not of my own volition. They were both terrible, as I knew they would be. I chuckled once during Epic Movie because I thought the guy did a pretty good Jack Sparrow impression.
I’ll even say that Scary Movie 2 was pretty good, but anything after that was just plain awful. Boo to Jason Friedberg for helping to dumb down Americans even more (the people who go see them are pretty stupid to begin with).
On 09/11/08 at 12:34 am
donkeysosa said:
Not a Scary Movie 2 fan. Remember that one Fatal Instinct with Armand Assante?
On 09/11/08 at 10:40 pm
Karl Rove said:
I remember it, but I haven’t seen it. It’s now on my list of movies to see. Ever heard of a horror movie called Uncle Sam? Isaac Hayes is in it. My friend just recommended it for me, so I’m going to watch that one once it comes in the mail.
On 09/11/08 at 10:50 pm
donkeysosa said:
I know it well. Check out the horror movies Jack Frost and Jack Frost 2. Great stuff.
On 09/11/08 at 9:41 pm
Jeff said:
Those movies are my favorites evar!!1