5 Songs That Women Have Totally Ruined For Me
Through each of our lives we date people and certain songs get associated with that person. Maybe you had a “song” that was “yours” that explained your relationship. Or perhaps you went to a concert together and it was a special moment in your relationship. Whatever the reason you had for associating that song eventually gets ripped to shreds when you break up making you never want to hear that song again.
Here are five songs that have been ruined by women for me that I never want to hear for the rest of my life.
5- Anything from “Dirty Dancing”
This one goes to my sister. No I didn’t have sex with her or date her. I hate every single song from the “Dirty Dancing” soundtrack for another reason.
When we were growing up we were allowed to rent one movie each every couple of weeks. I of course would choose a movie I haven’t seen before as my selection while my idiot sister would choose “Dirty Dancing” every single time without fail.
I have seen or been around someone viewing the movie “Dirty Dancing” at least a couple of hundred times. I know it word for word, I know Jennifer Grey’s fake ass laugh, I know the lyrics to all of the songs, and I want all of it removed from my head.
As a side note if a girl I am dating says that “Dirty Dancing” is one of her favorite movies I magically stop talking to her the next day.
Nine Inch Nails Closer
4- Closer by Nine Inch Nails
During my freshman year of college “Closer” by Nine Inch Nails was just about at its apex. I was dating a girl that said she read that it was the number one song in the UK to have sex to. So we had sex to it… Often.
I still don’t understand what the song being number one in the UK to have sex to had to do with two college students in Albany, NY but who was I to question the logic? Of course eventually I got sick of hearing the song along with her entire suite.
The one positive note about this is that she was a huge Bon Jovi fan, so I guess it was better to hear one song by Nine Inch Nails a few dozen times than anything by Bon Jovi.
the blue movie
3- The “Soundtrack” to “The Blue Movie”
During my four-year alcohol induced blackout I met this girl that attended Geneseo that was also the cute overnight cashier at the gas station (called Sugarcreek). Every six weeks or so she would come out to the bar that I was DJ’ing at and we would hook up. We never went on a date, we never talked on the phone, but it was just an unspoken thing if we saw each other out that we would be going home together that night. When the next morning rolled around one of us would get up and go. It might have been the most perfect relationship I was ever in. (probably because it wasn’t a relationship at all)
The one time she spent the day with me after a night out she asked if I had any adult movies. At that time I owned the Jenna Jameson classic, “The Blue Movie”. We put the movie on and watched the entire thing from start to finish taking time to reenact specific acts as they came on.
That was the first and only time I had ever watched a porn movie for longer than 3 minutes let alone the entire way through. It also ruined the entire movie for me because I realized how horrible the plot was and how annoying the music was if you listened to it for more than three minutes.
I gave it to my housemate for his massive porn collection and just stuck to the internet after that. Sugar Creek girl and I never saw each other again after this day.
I hate aerosmith
2- Anything from Aerosmith
Sure this list is supposed to be about women but I have to throw one guy in here who my friends and I technically consider a bitch. No it wasn’t a drunken college experience. This kid Travis that I used to be friends with in high school before he became a massive narc and spilled his guts to the police after a shaving cream incident went horribly wrong. (Another story for another day.)
Travis would only listen to Aerosmith. Travis was also one of the first people to have a car and give his friends a ride to school. To this day my entire group of friends hates not only Travis but Aerosmith because we heard all their crappy songs so many times.
When I purchased Guitar Hero a few weeks back the cashier at Best Buy told me I should wait to purchase the new Aerosmith one that was coming out. I almost reached across the counter to choke her.
garbage
1- Number One Crush by Garbage
Thanks to the craziest girl I ever dated I have a fear and hatred of the band Garbage. Specifically their song from the Romeo and Juliet soundtrack “Number One Crush” which she always wanted to have sex to (along with the “Fumbling Towards Ecstasy” album by Sarah McLachlan.) Not only was the song constantly played in the bedroom she would play it in the car, in her room, in my room, in my car, and I think she called and requested the local radio station to play it if we were in another car where she couldn’t bring her CD.
When I hear the lyric “And I will never be ignored” in the song I get a vision of Nicole standing outside my house in the pouring rain with a butchers knife with a blank look on her face like Private Pyle in “Full Metal Jacket”. Basically when the song comes on the radio I promptly piss myself.
Has a song ever been ruined by someone you have dated?
My past is littered with CDs filled with songs that I can now 1) no longer listen to because of some girl, and 2) not understand why I ever listened to it in the first place. Somehow in my college years “Best Of” albums were a big hit, and I’ve had many an artist ruined for one reason or another. There’s Air Supply (ruined because my gf would go to sleep listening to it every night). And Journey (ladies here’s a tip: when you’re in bed with a guy, don’t stop to ask if he can play Don’t Stop Believing or, worse, Open Arms). Nirvana (somehow I don’t think I’ll ever be able to listen to Smells Like Teen Spirit again). No Doubt (for many reasons, not just gf related). I could go on, but I digress. Ladies – stay away from your man’s music if you want the relationship to go anywhere.
If a girl asked me to play Air Supply every night I would grab her clothes, toss them out the window and tell her to get the hell out.
Well unless she was hot.
Ah, you see the dilemma!
Damn hot girls with no taste in music
Jesus! I guess I never needed radio play as part of my screwing. In fact, if a guy said ‘I like this song…I’d really like to fuck you to it!’ I would seriously consider my options.
Well there goes my plan
HAHAHA! Ohhhh, youuuu!
Hi Meghan. I like ‘Tip Toe Through The Tulips’ by Tiny Tim and I’d like to fuck you to it. And the name Tiny Tim is a misnomer in my case. It’s more like “Pack mule Matty”.
Hey, just seeing if it would work, Kevin. Great call on Aerosmith.
I thought it was raining outside but that sounds was actually Meghan getting excited. It is like a downpour in her pants.
I can never again listen to any music from Brian McKnight, an ex-boyfriend overplayed every c.d. he had (obviously this was in the 90’s). And though we never dated, my tone-deaf ex-roommate ruined quite a bit of music for me simply by overplaying it while singing along- terrible! Oh, and the neighbor of said roommate and I ruined Sweet Lady (Tyrese) which I never liked in the first place, but was made worse when he thought he might get lucky by singing it unprovoked to me in my living room one day. He totally didn’t get lucky and there was a real awkward moment of silence while he waited for a reaction before I announced that I had something I had to do somewhere.
I didn’t know anyone actually listened to Brian McKnight. That is a revelation in itself.
Corny, self absorbed, unattractive, overweight guys who delusionally think they are deserving of a record deal for their overly nasal renditions of sappy R&B love songs definitely listen Brian McKnight, in my experience. I could totally be pigeonholing here, but like I said, that’s been my experience.
This explains why the loser I knew and for some inexplicable reason, liked, would ALWAYS listen to Brian McKnight. His self absorbed, unattractive, obesity forced him to like it. Must be a part of the package. His name wasn’t Jason and he wasn’t from Del City, was he?
Damn ex.. the -first- time she cheated on me, it was in the next room, and she used ‘Tubular Bells’ to try and hide the noise.
Which was my all time favourite album, had been since infancy, and normally it would have been the album I’d put on to cope with the betrayal.. 7 years on and I’m still having trouble with it.
I had a girlfriend that cheated on me with a whale calls cd… it is a long story
You think Dirty Dancing was bad, my sister watched Grease everyday for almost 2 years. And now she wonders why she’s all fucked up and no one likes her. I think it permeated her genes and mutated her into a super douche.
Oooohhhhh that is no good. I dated a girl that loved Grease… I lost respect for her after I found out.
I just had to restart my computer, and now I am remembering the guy I dated that used to say something naughty to the Windows Log off tune…’DING ding ding DING’!. He’d replace the dings with dirty words. So as I just shut down I said something filthy, and not to be repeated.
Come on… please repeat it
Being a huge NIN fan, I am bummed to see Closer made it on the list. Hell, after reading why you hate it I understand completely. The Blue Movie soundtrack was worse than some of the old 70s porn music, by the way did you know they released a best of 70s porn music album in 97? The only way I know that is because when I was a music director at my college station we got a copy of that.
I need a copy of that.
Amazon has a ton of releases of porn music…including a Ron Jeremy album (and to think he has no talent!)
http://www.amazon.com/Sex-O-Rama-Music-Classic-Adult-Films/dp/B000001J7E/ref=pd_sim_m_2
I don’t really have any songs that have been ruined for me by a girl.
I lost my enjoyment of Aerosmith when they did Walk this Way with Kid Rock at the MTV Music Awards and then again with Britney Spears and all those other douches at the Superbowl.
A group of girls ruined Princess Bride for me in high school. They quoted every line while watching the movie twice on an 8 hour bus ride to Upstate NY for a school trip. They did the same thing with Grease on the way back but I already hated that movie.
They have played Walk This Way with everyone. Honestly if Yanni wanted to cover it with them they would…
Whores.
Who is the bigger whore with their music, Aerosmith, U2 or Michael Jackson?
Wow… I have respect for U2 on some level… I am going to go with Aerosmith because U2 wouldn’t do a duet with the lame ass people from the superbowl… And Michael hasn’t been able to produce anything worth selling off in a while.
My gay ex-boyfriend sang mushy songs to me while we were dating.
Most of them were crappy boy band songs so they sucked anyway but the one song I just cannot hear EVER is “God must have spent a little more time on you” by NSYNC… *shudders* gag me!
I have never heard the song and I don’t know if I ever need to.
I came across you at blogcatalog where I am known as gingerbeer25. I simply had to stumble this as it had me laughing out loud…I think you missed everything I do, I do for you by Brian Adams…if I have to hear that as one more wedding song I will be sick.
I totally ignored that… Oh crap I forget to include “Wonderful Tonight” on the list.
I was with a guy who wanted to do it to Fallen by Sarah Mclachlan. I never like the song to begin with, and now I just think he’s a homosexual.
I am so taking that off your mix cd.
Steely Dan.
I don’t know if I want to know
“Plush” by Stone Temple Pilots….my ex ruined this for me…..I LOVE Stone Temple Pilots too. But everytime he wanted to do the deed he put it on….like if it was waiting or something…I’m like yo get real. I dumped him for it too…
who wants to fuck to scott weiland?
I had an upstairs neighbor who would BLARE that whole first Jack Johnson cd when she had “company”…on repeat, all night long! AND a set of next door neighbors who would start their afternoons d’amour with “Hey, Did You Happen To See The Most Beautiful Girl In The World Today?” song from the ’70’s. We tried to make plans to leave when we heard that coming through the walls…*shudders to recall*
I couldn’t have sex to Jack Johnson I would fall asleep
i’m embarrassed to admit that i actually own “blue movie” and know exactly what you’re talking about. the whole guy w/ makeup and big earrings thing was NOT cool in that film… nor did it make sense.
i know… WHO expects porn to make sense. sadly, i do. must be a virgo thing.
The breaking into the movie set was just over the top… The whole office thing and her being a reporter. I didn’t buy it for a second.
Anything by Alanis Morrisette. Which is fine with me, since I think Alanis Morrisette sucks anyway, so the fact that this girl I dated listened to Jagged Little Pill nonstop just adds another layer of hatred.
Gotta agree with almost everything on here but don’t get the hate on for aerosmith. yeah..they’re pretty much old washed up money whores now and that song they did from “armagedon” makes me want to kill things but the truth is the early albums from the 70’s are still sound damn fine.
So many songs have been ruined for me and even though I’m female, some of them were ruined by the guys I dated and some by old female friends (no longer friends). It is all about time, place and context with me. Once that song is ruined…it is permanent, not to be reborn. I get it, really do.
Well – I hate to admit this – but I love Dirty Dancing – I recently bought a special edition DVD of it!
I have the girl who owns every song by Bush.
She loved them. We had sex. She went crazy.
End of story for Bush.
But the crazy girl sex was nice.
As I’m sure you know.
I can’t listen to Pretty Hate Machine or anything by Bjork anymore. I feel your pain. Great post hombre. I’ll be showing you some Digg love as well.
This is sooooo funny! Because as a chick myself, some of us really don’t think that much about “songs to have sex to”, we just fly by the seat of our pants, so to speak, a little more & just do it & hopefully, enjoy it! Songs to have sex to, HA! I thought THAT fad went out with the 80’s & cassette tapes! Jeez! Keep your chins up boys (& girls) there are still good people in the world!
Cassette tapes are out?
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Good.
I have much respect & artistic love for Garbage, but your “ordeal” is pretty understandable. I’d toss ‘em out, too, if I were you. lol
Cheers from Manila!
I don’t think so, i like “Anything” from Aerosmith
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Can’t a girl go to Bible Study without coming back to this?!?
Nobody talks to the Nanny like that! You’re both on the Naughty Step.
spank me?