Cum on Everybody, Let’s Go Boating!
God I love some of the hillbilly garbage that lives in my neck of the woods. Today Mrs. Donk and I were driving along when a big truck towing a boat got in front of us. I started laughing so hard that I almost wrecked the car as I noticed the name of the boat, emblazoned proudly on the back of the boat in huge pink letters:
Women CUM First
Using my Holmes-like powers of logic and reasoning, I quickly deduced a few things about the owner of the boat:
1) He really, really likes beer.
2) He has a two-word first name.
3) His boating excursions will someday end tragically when, in a drunken stupor, he drowns while trying to retrieve a corndog he has dropped into the lake.
4) He owns a hat that states emphatically that he is a “Bikini Inspector.”
5) Women most DEFINITELY do not cum first, if at all.
But I must say, the dude did inspire me. I’ve decided that I too am going to buy a boat, and when I do I will bequeath it with a name that matches my most dignified nature. Indeed. And when I do buy it, you all are invited to a party on board that new ship, the
S.S. Show Me Your Tits

















