I love a good high school “I got my period at the wrong time” story. I first discovered them when I was dating a girl in high school (um we both were in high school, don’t get the wrong idea) that got a copy of YM Magazine and I have been hooked ever since. In fact before we go any further let me share one with you from ym.com:
It was Career Day at my school and professionals were guest speakers. In one of the sessions, we had a physician, who happened to be the one I go to, talking about how patients come in for complaints of common symptoms, such as coughing all the time or frequent fatigue. Then the doctor was talking about how women come in and complain about symptoms they have with their cycle.
Coincidentally, it was that time of the month for me, but I was winding down, so I wore a slim pantyliner instead of a tampon. A moment later, the doctor said out loud, “Ah, it looks like Marcie will have to come see me, so I can check out her problem.” It turns out my period was heavier than I thought, and spotted my pants. Everyone gawked at me and laughed. My crush was laughing so hard he was crying. I’m now a junior in high school and my friends still won’t leave me alone about this incident. I am never using generic brand pads again.
-Marcie, 17, Brooklyn, NY
If that isn’t entertaining I don’t know what is. I wonder if Tampax sent that in to destroy the business of generic brand pads everywhere? Poor Marcie I can just image her leaving a trail of tears and blood on her way to the bathroom with her crush laughing at her the entire time, oh the horror. There just has to be someone on the YM staff that just gets paid to write this crap up, I want that job so bad. Last year I constructed a letter to send to YM (check out that post if you don’t remember, it has my favorite line in a blog ever) that sadly never made the website (I seriously check like once a month).
(Marcie’s heavy flow covers Brooklyn)
About a month or two ago there was something that I noticed with the stories, they now had a rating scale so people can vote on it:
1 star= Glad it didn’t happen to me
2 stars= Friends must still be talking about it
3 stars= Total embarrassment
4 stars= Better switch school districts
Now that was the single greatest thing YM could have ever, now not only could you read about people’s most embarrassing moments but you can rate the level of how shameful it actually was. However I kind of don’t like the way their rating scale is, because really to every teenage girl the three star rating applies automatically to whatever story they are telling. Also I don’t think that this rating scale correctly captures the over dramatic view of teenage girls, so I propose we come up with a new rating scale to send to them.
Here is my proposed rating system (leave your own or make corrections in the comments below):
1 star= I had to fake the flu and stay home for a week while cutting my inner thighs daily
2 stars= Better switch school districts because now I can only screw outcasts
3 stars= Have you ever seen the movie “Carrie”?
4 stars= I’ve gone goth
What would you change on the ratings scale?
This is going up at humor-blog.com