In the past I have talked about how I lucid dream and feel like I am living the dream while it is happening. While I have had some cool dreams like robbing Sam’s Club with Samuel L Jackson involved or watching a girl I like make out with a hot actress none of them emotionally scared me when I woke up. This morning I woke up and thought about how I could possibly bleach my brain. Here is why:
The dream starts out and I am in a nice apartment, I am walking around and see someone on a computer. I walk over to them and it is Liza Minnelli, sobbing uncontrollably at this computer desk. Minnelli is wearing a black pants suit with a low cut top. She goes on to tell a story about college basketball coach Bob Knight and how he broke her heart, now she is really upset that he is retiring from coaching. I put my arm on her shoulder to console her and she begins to make out with me.
(Oh if you are vomiting now just wait.)
She stands up and makes her way to the bedroom and falls backwards onto the bed, I take the bottom part of her pants suit off. And then remove her underwear. Now her underwear was made up of pieces of my boxer shorts, like it was quilted together. I was looking at her um… I don’t want to call it a vagina because it was more like a pit of despair… She then says, “Usually men have a problem with that darling.”
I replied, “With your vagina?”
“No, with my choice of underwear.”
At this point my brain kicked in and I was like… HOLY SHIT I AM ABOUT TO HAVE A SEX DREAM WITH LIZA MINNELLI!! WAKE UP… I popped up out of bed like someone slapped me in the face while I was sleeping. I have been up since four A.M. sitting in the shower trying to feel clean again. It isn’t happening.
What was your worst sex/almost sex dream? What the hell does this dream mean?