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Jan
21

Come on Wisconsin Step It Up

By: Bobby Finstock on 01/21/08 @ 8:10 am

Sunday morning I was cruising around the web looking for my usual entertainment of underage snuff films and fun bestiality pictures when I found an article on yahoo about a prank a Wisconsin television station is attempted to play on NY Giants Quarterback Eli Manning.

Here is a synopsis of their big prank:

A Green Bay television station decided to have some fun this week after employees discovered that Giants quarterback Eli Manning’s favorite show is “Seinfeld.” Station officials decided to pull the episode scheduled for Saturday afternoon and replace it with a different program chosen by viewers.

Really, you call that a prank?

Come on Wisconsin you need to step it up, in fact I am a little upset about all of this. Do you really think that is a practical joke? While it is cute it doesn’t really count, you really need to come correct. Let me give you some suggestions for next time you are in this situation.

If you can’t think of anything good, deploy a hooker- Seriously Lawrence Taylor of the Giants used to send hookers to opponents rooms the night before big games, why not take a page out of his book? Also make sure they are herpes ridden, after all it is the gift that keeps on giving. I’m sure this lady is available on the cheap:

packers fan

Although to be honest with you I think the whole hooker thing is played out… Personally if I was you I would do this.

Fake dead kids go far- You wait until Eli is off to dinner with his teammates and get a child actress to lay in his tub covered in fake blood. For added fun make sure you have blood running from their anus. Call the cops about ten minutes before Eli is supposed to be back and when Eli gets back from dinner there is a whole hell of a lot of commotion. It would be awfully hard to sleep after being slapped up against the wall and screamed at by the police being called a child killer while everything gets sorted out. Also when he gets up and sees the flake blood in the shower to remind him of what happened he will probably throw up a few times.

Wiping your ass on the pillow could potentially lead to pink eye- Come on hotel staff, we know you cut corners and do gross shit all the time. A little fecal matter on Eli’s pillow could lead to a massive pink eye outbreak.

I’m not even going to get into all the stuff you could do with his food.

So next year Green Bay you know what to do, maybe that will help you get into the Super Bowl.

If you had the ability to pull off any massive prank what would you do?

Filed in: News

About the author

Bobby Finstock

Finstock is founder of Pointlessbanter.net. He is known for his encyclopedia like knowledge on the life and times of Scott Baio. In the future he hopes to write again under his own name in order to impress the ladies and build his celebrity to the levels of other failed internet writers.

25 Responses to “Come on Wisconsin Step It Up”

  1. Melissa says:

    How is tha even a joke? haha

    I like the “pink eye” prank the best!

  2. Isha or Aiyisha, whatever the f*ck u wanna call me. says:

    Haha. God I’m pissed the Giants won last night. I was kinda hoping that Green Bay would win to at least let Favre see another Super Bowl, rumors are he might retire. But we all know the Pats are going to destroy the Giants!!! Go Pats.

    As for the “prank”, remember this is Green Bay, Wisconsin. They are to close to Canada, eh. They don’t know what real pranks are anyway. And I would have gone for the fake dead girl prank, I could just see the look on Eli Manning’s face. Priceless.

  3. em em says:

    The cheese bra strikes me as disturbing…bleh. =(

  4. The Muse says:

    I would set you up with a craigslist trannie!

  5. Valerie says:

    OMG…a cheese bra…that’s just weird. And the PATS are going to win the superbowl, they are not the kind of team to get that far and blow it. Anyway, for a prank, I have no idea, im not good at that kind of stuff. I would be mean and put at laxative in his drink or something like that.

  6. Vic Beckham says:

    Did they really think that on the night before the big game, Eli would be searching the local channel guide to find when Seinfeld would be on? They didn’t think that he might have the entire series on dvd? This is what you get when you feed a population cheese kurds and beer.

    Do you think that with the success of the Manning brothers, somewhere all the sons of Rick Barry are plotting their demise?

  7. Meghan says:

    You need to get Peyton in on the joke. Get Eli widly drunk in a hotel room while you pull a switch-eroo of his locks. Car, Home etc. When he tries to find his way back the next day have Peyton in his home, with his woman both wearing NY Giants gear acting as if there is NO ELI. “There is only one Manning, who are you??”

  8. Sue says:

    C’mon that was probobly a picture of a high school principle or local newscaster in the cheese bra. It’s WI!

  9. Trisha says:

    C’mon do you really expect anything else from Wisconsin? Any state that has a thing called “Roadkill Punch” at parties is beyond lame.

    ALL HAIL THE NEW YORK GIANTS!!

    It’s gonna be a great Super Bowl. We know the Patriots are gonna win, but I think the Giants will give them a good game- like they did a few weeks ago. For me, the fact that they are going is enough. Although it would be nice if they won, Brady and crew seems destined to have the real “perfect season”. Then the ‘72 Dolphins can stfu already. So it’s a win/win.

  10. James says:

    dude, that looked like Laurie Metcalf. The sister from Rosanne.

  11. I love the prank the Iranians played on the US battleships. Releasing the video with the ominous voice was perfect. Those clever rascals. We almost believed they had WMD too.

    Too me a good prank requires possibility of severe bodily injury if caught.

  12. I agree, terrible prank. There was a show I saw recently which involved a daughter getting “punk’d” into believing that her mom was being raped in the laundry room. That’s the kinda shit I’m talking about. Make ‘em cry a little, yeah?

  13. mistakenone says:

    hahah
    pooty on my pillow eeeeeeew // The cheese cups reminds me of Crocs for the feet…UGLY yet playful

  14. serah says:

    go *P*A*T*R*I*O*T*S*!

  15. Rebecca Jay says:

    ok, I live in Wisconsin, Green Bay is nowhere near Canada- check out a map asshats! Yes, it is close to the dumbest prank I’ve ever heard of, but we all can’t be as depraved as you!!!

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