No I don’t run a meth lab I just have a cold
As I sit here typing this I am looking at my yahoo front page which was the weather in sunny Southern California, it is currently 74 degrees. Now I turn my head and look at the window and it is snowing. What the hell was I thinking by moving to Buffalo to go to grad school?
My body now officially hates me because of the weather change and decided to show its utter disdain for me by giving me the flu. So this weekend has been spent by me piddling around my apartment and being miserable. I gave up going to the Sabres game on Friday, going to a birthday party last night, and even forgoing an invite to the Canadian ballet. All so I could convalesce and watch “You, Me, and Dupree” like four times on HBO, even though I hate the movie.
Yesterday I went to buy some cold and flu medicine at a local grocery store. They have a self checkout lane which I use regularly. As I scan in my medicine a little alarm goes off and my screen flashes a warning that I needed to show my ID to an attendant. Of course this made me miserable so I slogged to the front and got in line to see the attendant. This is where I learned that some people are just way too stupid to use the self check out line. Here are some of the issues people were in line for:
-the machine wasn’t accepting their coupon
reason: they were putting it in upside down
-the machine wasn’t accepting their credit card
reason: they were putting the card in the wrong way
As I stood there in line hearing the lady explain that all they needed to do was follow the directions on the screen, I saw a guy with a fantastic toupee using the ATM machine. It honestly had to be the first time he was using it. Each time he did a transaction he would pull his card out and start a new one. Then when he put it in the last time he didn’t need to do the transaction so he tried to pull the card out as the machine automatically pulled it in. Finally after he gave up on doing the last transaction he walked away leaving his card in the machine, then getting all freaked out when the machine just kept beeping because his card was in there. It might have been the most entertaining thing I have ever watched, because whenever he moved his head his toupee would kind of bounce.
At this point I made it to the front of the line so I had to stop watching the entertainment. I told the attendant that I had to show her my id.
Attendant: What are you purchasing?
Me: Cold and Flu medicine.
Attendant: You are not purchasing this to make meth are you?
It was hard to tell if she was joking or not but I think she was dead serious, when the hell did this become procedure? Thank god for timing, as I let out a big cough and didn’t cover my mouth, a little mixture of spittle and phlem landed on her left elbow.
Me: No Miss, I am not.
She let me go on merry way and back to the self checkout line. By then I saw with the guy with the toupee going to the bank counter next to the atm asking why the machine was beeping at him. It is the little things that cheer you up.
Question of the day: What is the worst misuse of technology you have ever witnessed?
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it would have to be those one day dvd rental machine that are in grocery stores now. those things are pure entertainment. standing in line watching people use it and then get pissed off when their card cannot be read or the machine spits out the wrong dvd is just priceless
I guess I have some grass is greener syndrome this morning. I miss heavy snowfalls, I haven’t had decent sledding conditions since I moved from Chicago.
Worst technology moments would come from my Navy days, when I worked in the IT shop. We actually got trouble tickets for 1) the monitor was broken (or user didn’t know what an on/off switch was for) and 2) the CD drive was broken (or user was so damn impatient they didn’t wait until it spooled) and 3) blue screen of death, it doesn’t really mean to halt all work and wait for a sysadmin to show up.
Since those days, I ignore people and technology…
Sorry you’re sick
First good luck with the cold. Welcome back to the North 40, sir. The Canadian Ballet is always a great healer.
Second, it had to be an old lady trying to use a blackberry. So many buttons and numbers, you’d think she was trying to figure out Lunar Module.
Worst misuse of technology I have ever witnessed was using the internet to look up useful/helpful information instead of porn…haha
Oh god. I hate that self check out lines. I am one of those idiots who doesn’t know how to scan products. I hope you feel better soon…
and I too wondered what the hell were you thinking by moving back to the arctic cold of NE… then I realized I did the same thing.
At least you can buy Sudafed. We can’t even buy it here without a prescription. Damn methheads have ruined it for everyone. What good is cold medicine without the good stuff in it?
Don’t ever get behind anyone with produce in the self checkout line. They will not be able to figure out how to ring it up.
The cold meds one still pisses me off.
But the #1 technology pisser is, for me, the voice automated response system you get when you call large companies. They make you talk all clearly and stuff and never let you just talk to a person without telling the computer all this other crap first.
I froze my butt off here in Southen California last night.
i loathe people in the self checkout lanes. if you can’t figure out a calculator, you should probably just go to a line where there’s a cashier assface. my grandma buys claritin d and they card her every time. she’s an 81 year old chubby gram with casts on both legs. yeah, she’s definitely making meth.
You must be ill to watch that movie. I saw it in the theatres when it was 112 degrees outside. I’d almost rather be roasting.
Last year, my 87 year old Grandmother went to purchase some Claritin D. They have a drive thru window at her pharmacy. They made her give her drivers license and all that because of the meth thing. THEN they yelled at her and told her she couldn’t use the drive through next time to purchase this medicine, so the cameras could give her the once over. THEY YELLED AT MY GRANDMOTHER!!! She was so upset- it’s a good thing that I’m 2000 miles away. I would have gotten arrested when I went in and kicked some ass. That was overkill to put it mildly.
Same as all the above.
Adding this: coin-op car washes where you have to exchange your five dollar bill for a bucket of quarters to feed into the car wash box.
You didn’t ask, but the best new use of tech? Credit cards to buy soft drinks.
Since moving to Austin in August(for school), and working at Starbucks I have noticed 3 people buy Coffee for their kids, only to see the kids spill the coffee on themselves. I don’t put the lid on properly on purpose, which sort of counts as me not using technology properly. Does that make me a bad person?
you cant buy suddafed unless its from the pharmacy…they ID you and then check to see how often you buy it…during cold season I buy it quite a bit and always the same brand so that they question me…i say “you can make meth outta this? i didnt know that…now I do…thanks!”
Do they really think all the meth heads break under super market cashiers thorough questioning?
“Yes! I’m buying this to make drugs!”
I agree. The last time I bought Sudafed I think the pharmacy tech ran a background check on me. I know I had to take the little hang tag to the window and sign my name like three times. I seriously thought a blood sample was going to be required.
The worst self checkout experience I’ve had was at a Wal-Mart, you know I hate Wal-Mart, and the lady in front of me was teaching her 6-year-old how to use the scanner. Urghhhh.
My mom occasionally will use her cell phone to text or call me even when I am in the next room, outside of the house, and yes, she has even done it while sitting next to me while to give me her order as we wait in line of a drive-through. I’m not sure if it’s my mother being lazy, abusing the technology, or just being giddy and retarded for finding out the different functions of a cell phone. After saying that, she did think that when her contact list said phone book, it would have all the numbers of people like an actual phone book. Poor mom, it’s only a matter of time before I have to take her out to pasture.
People around here just arent that bright
The most annoying thing about those self checkout lines is when you try to buy produce and need to look everything up… There are about 6 different type of lettuce and a billion different apples and god knows theyre all different prices! PAIN IN THE ASS! There should be a rule that people DO NOT use those lines when theyve got fresh produce without a upc code!
So sorry youre sick! I have also had a nasty cold the last week, and trying to buy sudafed is a freaking nightmare! They actually had it locked behind the counter at the stupid customer service desk!
Damned meth makers! Getting a good cold medicine these days is a lost cause!
Hope you feel better soon!
biggest abuse of technology?
when people are on their effing blue tooths, come into the “customer service-y” area of where i work, look directly @ me, ask a question, i try to help, and then they get all pissed off and annoyed because i didn’t know they were asking it of the person in their EAR.
i every department store should have a little “cell phone corral.” sit there and talk your important life, and when you’re done come out into the real world and interact with ACTUAL people.
oh, and p.s? if you’re on the phone and you come up to my counter? i’m not playing the “no i don’t want this one, i want that one” pantomime game. i *will* walk away. either that or i will ask as many questions possible to interrupt your conversation as MUCH as possible.
it’s funny to watch you get upset because you think I”M being rude to YOU.
er…so when will the meth be ready?
“the worst misuse of technology’
Is that what happened in Florida and how Bush got to be president?
xoxo
I’m shocked you can even buy your cold medicine with just a flash of your ID. If you live in true meth capitals like all of Missouri or here in Las Vegas you can’t even get the drugs to take to a self checkout. They are behind the counter and they have to get your ID and run your name through a computer first.
Since you are so close to the Canadian border, might I recommend you look for a medicine called Cold-FX. Its the “Official cold remedy of the NHL” and the stuff really works. Also, no ID required to purchase it.
[...] memory serves me correctly, I believe that Kevin over at Pointless Banter was the first to email and say thank [...]
I work in a cell phone store and my favorite has to be the customer who clearly still has a rotary dial phone at home coming in and asking to buy the newest blackberry for themselves. When that happens, we usually call it ESO… the Equipment is Superior to the Operator. Kinda funny. Hope you feel better!!
Hahahaha! I’m sorry, but I can’t stop laughing because you have to experience the cold of the East again. It’s funny to me, I’m evil.
feel better. im sick too. it sux. no offense, but id rather be sleeping at 552am than reading your blog. but since coughing kept me up, this will do…
Come across the border. Our health system doesn’t care if you’re a methhead. We sell it all over the counter, including codeine. And save your cash on the cold-FX, it’s just ginsing and echinaechia. Get better soon.
Where I live you are allowed two box a month per house hold and you must show ID. Your name is put a meth list. Once a month the cops pull all the records and see if any one has went over there limit. If so they get a search warrant and raid your home and you get put in jail weather or not they find anything.Because some ppl. buy the boxes and sell them to the meth makers for good money or for the meth.
This isn’t really a misuse of technology, but once when my computer was apart, I saw on one of the parts it said “not a handle”. Now, is that warning really necessary? Should it have really said, “not a step”?
haha i cant even go into a store with my snotty children and buy claritan without getting the third degree, what they dont see the beutiful green snot? claritan and any sort of childrens meds actually, robutusin, delsym, you name it. i got pulled over once when i was doing security and had one full and one almost gone bottle of laundry soap (you know so that i didnt have to make a seperate stop after i ran out) anyways i got questioned about having that much detergent, turns out its a meth ingredient, who knew~ good thing i didnt have any claritan with me! might have gone to jail!!
You have a great sense of humor and it is a real pleasure reading your stuff. I hope you are definitely feeling better. I have lived in NY my entire life and I must say you never get used to the snow, cold, and illness. Keep your Yahoo page set to sunny CA because that will be the upside when NY really gets dumped on! I love a good Sabres game myself so I am sorry you had to miss that! Those are always a blast to be at.
I have just learned to sit quietly and not press any buttons. They’ll think you have a rotary dial phone or you’re a mute and they will transfer you to a real human being. Sometimes I just keep pressing zero until the system transfers me to someone in India.
No, that makes you awesome.
As for the actual blog comment. I used to hate those self-checkouts but now I’ve managed to learn to use them properly. Still, I’d rather deal with a cashier, I feel bad that these machines are starting to take over their jobs.
The whole cold meds/meth thing is really annoying. I know they’re just doing their job but to make everyone feel like a criminal, especially when they’re clearly in need of the medicine for its intended purpose is just wrong.
this is as annoying.
i give kudos to parents that want to teach their children manners, and how the world works, etc.
but please do it on your own time!
i work in a bakery where we give out free cookies to the kids.
i have 3 MILLIONS tasks to accomplish. i don’t have time to sit there while you try to cajole a “thank you” out of your kid.
since this page never lets me leave comments I am as usual I’m commenting on a comment… the time when some guy left his card in the machine in one of those teller kiosks.. it was sasying would you like another transaction? And when I ran after him he hopped in his ( BMW.. dumbass!) and sped off! it was like 3 in the afternoon! He had over $35000 in his account.. regret it to thsi day I didntgive him a stupidity fine!!
All day long I have to call mortgage co’s and talk to automated tellers. Once hitting zero didn’t work for getting an operator, so I said “well then fuck you, phone!”. The automated voice then responded “Sorry you’re having trouble, Let me transfer you to a customer service rep”.
Thats the secret my friend
Oh, that reminds me. About 5 years ago, I gave my mom my cell phone so I could reach her and vice versa. I programmed my office number into the phone and showed her how to dial the number.
Later that afternoon I get a call from a number I didn’t recognize. I pick up, its mom. She says “I tried to call you but I couldn’t get a dial tone on your phone so I found a pay phone” We continue to talk until I suddenly realize what she just said.
“ummmm mom, cell phones don’t *have* a dial tone”
She’s come a long way but she still calls me if I send her a text because she doesn’t know how to text back.