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I Hate Wrong Numbers

By: Bobby Finstock on 10/8/07 @ 9:45 am

Last night at about 10pm my phone rang, the caller ID showed that it was an unlisted number. My parents number is unlisted so I figured it was them calling, I answered only to be greeted with a woman launching right into a conversation.

I had ZERO idea who it was but she kept talking and then broke into Spanish. Of course I let this go on for like two minutes… Those are two minutes that I will never get back in my entire life. I don’t know why I let it go on for so long. Secretly I was hoping for her to say something juicy and interesting. Maybe how she just stabbed a guy 57 times with a fork and needs to hide his body or how it burns when she pisses. I wanted something to come about that would make using my time worthwhile. Instead I just kept saying hello and hung up.

What is the deal with people just launching into conversations now? When did that become normal? Ugh…

I guess one of the reasons why I am so bitter about wrong numbers is back when I went to school at Albany I got a random call at like 1 am one night from a girl that just started saying some of the filthiest shit ever. I stopped her a few minutes into her extremely descriptive story asking her if she had the right number, she told me she dialed it randomly. Making it the single greatest wrong number call ever.

Phone Sex

So I let her continue… until she uh, I guess finished in more than one sense of the word. This happened at least four more times the spring of my freshman year. Finally I asked her if she wanted to meet and she got really shy about it saying that she could never live up to what she talked about on the phone. She did tell me what quad she lived on and I would occasionally walk through there hoping that maybe I would hear her talking to a friend or something. The wrong number the other night made me think of this story, I always wondered what the girl looked like. Or maybe it is better that I don’t know and have a vision of how she did in my head.

Of course it was probably something gross like a cousin or the one cafeteria worker with a hunchback.

What is the best wrong number call you have ever had?

About the author

Bobby Finstock

Finstock is founder of Pointlessbanter.net. He is known for his encyclopedia like knowledge on the life and times of Scott Baio. In the future he hopes to write again under his own name in order to impress the ladies and build his celebrity to the levels of other failed internet writers.

22 Responses to “I Hate Wrong Numbers”

  1. says:

    It was me on the phone. In Albany, not yesterday. Just letting you know.

  2. says:

    We used to have the kids applying for the local cummunity college call our house all summer long asking if they had got in. After a few months we would start telling them no. We used to get welfare too. \par
    The best? Some guy always called for his gf at 11pm, after weeks of telling the ass he had the wrong number we asked him to hold on and left the phone off the hook, shouting her name in the background. We waited a while and then came back and said she was with her man and couldn’t come to the phone. He hung up and never called back.

  3. says:

    does drunk dialing count in this?

  4. says:

    It was meeeeeeeee Kevin!!

  5. says:

    I had some guy call my parents house on some holiday and he had the wrong number. We talked for a few minutes and I swear to GOD he called back much later to talk to me again. Best wrong number EVER.\par
    Oh and then when I was in college we kept getting calls for this spanish woman…and when we moved to the new dorm? STILL got ‘em!

  6. says:

    when I was an RA during my undergrad years, I would always get prank phone calls. This one guy kept calling me asking if I would have phone sex with him. After a while he would start talking dirty as soon as I picked up the phone. In one of his phone calls he started describing my room, so I thought it was one of my residents. The next time he called I kept him on the line while I walked door to door. I found out he lived three doors down from me. As he was getting his sex on, I knocked on his door. He opened the door waring a towel and holding his pone…he stopped calling me after that.

  7. says:

    In St. Louis in the 80s my roommate and I were interviewed by local tv . Then we got several crank calls in the middle of the night calling us random names, mostly about us being stupid. Pissed me off…I will never do an interview again unless I’m immensely famous and unlisted.

  8. says:

    *sigh* people only ever want to sell me stuff on the phone.

  9. says:

    I keep getting phone calls on my cell phone from a doctor’s office asking for some chick I’ve never heard of. Of course every time they call I’m not there so I can’t tell them that she doesn’t live here. Maybe I should just say that she died?

  10. says:

    well, my phone number is 1 digit off from the local wal-mart…i get calls for them ALL the time, one day though, while i was grumpy this happened, they asked if we were open (its a super wal-mart a 24/7 store)and i yelled real loud, ‘No were closed, dont bother me again” and hung up….

  11. says:

    My number is just 1 number off from Ryan’s steak house. We always have people calling asking for the main dish served that night. I use to be nice & say you have the wrong number, now, I tell them whatever we are having for dinner. One of those great nights of fix whatever you can find night, I was having a grilled cheese & my son was having a can of beannie weinnes So, I told the guy, grilled cheese & beannie weinne’s. He was like what? I repeated it, and he said are you serious, I said, Uhmmmm yeah, it’s if you want it fix it night. He just poliety said ok thank you. I can see that man, telling his wife that, and her reaction.

  12. says:

    Really now…

  13. says:

    What type of number did you have?

  14. says:

    sure why not

  15. says:

    I didn’t know you could speak spanish

  16. says:

    she is stalking you

  17. says:

    A phone number… duh.

  18. says:

    that always works… you could say you ate her

  19. says:

    You are missing out

  20. says:

    Aw that is no good… You needed to change your name or something

  21. says:

    that is awesome and frightening at the same time

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