This could possibly be the single greatest news story I have ever read.
A 21 year old spitfire that the article described as a “little hippie girl” went totally insane and assaulted a karaoke singer when they got on to the stage to sing Coldplay’s “Yellow”. From the article:
As soon as the man on stage started singing about the stars in his
best Chris Martin impersonation, the woman reportedly said: “Oh, no,
not that song. I can’t stand that song!”
Witnesses said her distaste for Coldplay quickly took a violent
turn, and she leaped at the would-be crooner, shouting expletives and
telling him that his singing “sucked,” while expressing the same
opinion of the song, according to a Seattle police report.
When she got outside she punched a few people in the face and head butted a police officer. You would figure that this girl was hammered or something right? Nope according to the article she had one shot of Jagaermeister.
This got me thinking though, what songs could potentially make me do this?
1) Limp Bizkit- Nookie
I have seen this song performed one time at karaoke and it almost made me walk out of the bar. All I can think about is Fred Durst masturbating to pictures Christina Aguilera and Britney Spears when I hear this song. (Good luck at getting that vision out of your head next time you hear that song.)
2) Led Zeppelin- Stairway to Heaven
There should be a law that says you can’t do a Karaoke song if it is over 4 minutes long. Anything longer than that is purely self indulgent and totally unneeded, pretty much like 45% of this song.
Random note: Did you know that Tevin Campbell has a greatest hits album? Neither did I….
3) The Charlie Daniels Band- The Devil Went Down to Georgia
My distaste for this song cannot be put into words. This picture sums it up:
4) Anything by Culture Club
For some reason this just makes everything uncomfortable, like people aren’t sure what to say or act when someone whips out Culture Club. The bar becomes dead silent and everyone is afraid to look at anyone of the same gender without a little bit of discomfort. The ice is eventually broken by someone cracking a Boy George and thirty pounds of coke joke.
What karaoke song would make you potentially assault the singer and then head butt police?