Thank You Lohan Family
You know I am a little upset right now, the Lohan Family is having the ultimate melt down right now and I was stuck in a car driving cross country. Great timing… I have stated before how I am thoroughly entertained by the Lohans who have basically become the example of what not to do when your daughter gets famous.
Today I sat down to read some of the news and get caught up on all that is happening with this… There is so much to make fun of and so little time, let me go through this point by point.
1) “It wasn’t my cocaine.”- Whenever you get arrested for possession telling someone that it wasn’t your illegal substance is the dumbest excuse ever. I don’t ever recall any of my friends asking me to hold some coke for them, even if they didn’t have any pockets. (Isn’t the proper move to store it by your sack or in your crack?) She should have come up with something a little better than playing the “it wasn’t mine” card. Personally I would have gone with, “This is what happens when you hang around with Andy Dick.”
At least she didn’t say she thought it was confectionery sugar that she uses to sprinkle on her pancakes at Dennys.
2) Hey Press is Press- In reading through all the articles about this whole debacle I read about numerous e-mails sent by her family to Access Hollywood, both her mother and her sister were sending them messages giving them updates. I don’t get the logic in this, if you want to shelter your family member would not talking to the press rank right up there on the top of your list? Maybe they figured she was going to jail and couldn’t do a press junket for her new movie where she plays a stripper?
And what the hell is the deal with girls playing strippers and not actually getting naked? How can we continue to let this go on? First Jessica Alba in Sin City and now Lohan? I mean really, how can I believe in their performance? Is there a petition that I can sign to fight this? We need to take action here people, this can’t stand or we are going to have an entire generation of stripper movies with no nudity, which I find totally unacceptable.
3) Her Dad is back in the picture- I love her father, I mean anyone that basically says he wants to kill his entire family, goes to jail like 7 times and then pops back up and drops this nugget when his daughter is in trouble, “We have got to put aside fighting each other and focus on our daughter, who clearly needs us right now.” Doesn’t he catch on that his daughter might have picked up her behavior from him?
I am just waiting for the lawsuit about five years from now when we find out that her parents basically pissed away her money and exploited her leaving her broke and working at Orange Julius in the mall.
Which celebrity do we not hear about in the next five years?
Read the latest from Bobby Finstock
Read the latest from Donkeysosa
On 08/2/07 at 4:45 am
said:
I don’t think we will hear about any of the current celebs that have gone crazy…..whether its Paris, Lindsey, Britney, Nicole, or any of the ones that seem to be in our face lately. I think that they will eventually just drop off the planet due to over exposure by the media, or a drug overdose, or jail time. They definitely do enough to keep me entertained but it is a bit tiresome to see the same faces everyday on the gossip pages.
On 08/2/07 at 4:46 am
said:
Holy shit, am i seriously fist?
On 08/2/07 at 4:55 am
said:
Yeah you get an award and everything… actually a new car.
On 08/2/07 at 4:58 am
said:
That’s sad, such a waste for such a talented girl. Fuckin family…..
On 08/2/07 at 5:04 am
said:
I get so tired of these girls. If the press ignored them for a month I am betting that people would just move on to something else.
and then is a year there would be a new episode of that old show on vh~1…where are they now?
On 08/2/07 at 5:23 am
said:
[quote post="639"]Yeah you get an award and everything… actually a new car. [/quote]
Can I pick the kinda car I want??
On 08/2/07 at 5:45 am
said:
I’m betting we don’t hear a word from “Herbie” for at least a decade. How dare she bring Herbie down with her!!
On 08/2/07 at 5:46 am
said:
My vote is that we don’t hear about Kirsten Dunst for the next five…oh who am I kidding? I hope we never hear about her again. I hope she gets lost in the woods and forgets who she is and then comes across and lives in a hippie commune, names herself something obnoxious like “Fruitloop Sunshine Passion” and starts making baskets to sell at Farmers’ Markets in the area, never to be seen by the public eye again.
On 08/2/07 at 6:55 am
said:
lol…why you hating on Kirsten man- i mean those baskets are actually quiet beautiful, you try wearing for 12 hours a day and making something……..hahahaha
On 08/2/07 at 6:55 am
said:
That was my first reaction, too! No one who does coke gives it to a buddy to hold on to it for them.
They’re afraid it might be lost, or worse, they would take some of out of it. Hello?
On 08/2/07 at 8:01 am
said:
I have never had the “it’s not mine” claim work when the drugs where found ON the person. Now in a car yes.
The question I have is why didnt she drop the coke before she went INTO police custody?
On 08/2/07 at 10:11 am
said:
If she wants a chance in “life” she needs at least 3 consecutive years in rehab. “Life” meaning her career, since that’s all she has to live for. Or not.
On 08/2/07 at 3:19 pm
said:
I’m tired of hearing about Lindsay Lohan. Actually, I’m just tired of hearing people say, “It’s a shame, she’s a really talented girl.” Excuse me, what? Did you see Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen? I have not seen her in a convincing role since Parent Trap, and even then her British accent was a piece of crap. She’s a no-talent coke whore who is basically a little bit mentally retarded (Coming out of rehab and getting arrested for DUI with coke only 11 days later? COME ON.)
And as for who we don’t hear from in five years, I’m hoping Brittany Spears. I hope that after her disastrous video comes out and they take her children away that she becomes a recluse.
On 08/2/07 at 5:13 pm
said:
I don’t wanna hear anything more about Britney. Her star fell from the sky and landed right in the trailer park. I think the only way she’d make a comeback is if one if her kids gets famous and she latches on to his coattails…that or sing on Kevin Federline’s album.
On 08/2/07 at 6:33 pm
said:
The people who make these people popular are people who are constantly talking about them! So, Quit talking about them and let’s talk about something or someone with some substance - and not substance abuse!
On 08/4/07 at 5:21 am
said:
Didn’t you hear?
They weren’t her pants!
She was wearing someone else’s pants!
LOL
On 08/6/07 at 7:52 am
said:
[quote post="639"]She was wearing someone else’s pants![/quote]
oh yeah! it MIGHT be plausible… haven’t you seen all those pics of young starlets going into clubs and for some reason they trade clothes in the ladies’ rooms? truly weird. there’s even a “only in vegas” commercial where a blonde and a brunette go into a bathroom, and while in there, they exchange wigs. wtf?
On 08/6/07 at 9:27 am
said:
I wish she’d just admit she’s a die-hard druggie and go to jail for..a couple months at least (to get fully detoxed).
Her family’s so screwed up I wish she’d leave them the hell out of her life as well. Maybe her sister’s okay, she’s young