"Maybe it was a dream, you know, a very weird, bizarre, vivid, erotic, wet,
detailed dream. Maybe we have malaria."

Jul
17

Why I Could Never Be a Paparazzi

By: Bobby Finstock on 07/17/07 @ 1:24 pm

This might be the worst celebrity photo ever taken… This is when I saw Dolph Lundgren on at the airport on my way home from Cannes.

Dolph Lundgren Picture

Notice how I make sure to get my thumb in front of the camera… Outstanding work if I do say so myself…

I totally suck.

Filed in: My Life

About the author

Bobby Finstock

Finstock is founder of Pointlessbanter.net. He is known for his encyclopedia like knowledge on the life and times of Scott Baio. In the future he hopes to write again under his own name in order to impress the ladies and build his celebrity to the levels of other failed internet writers.

42 Responses to “Why I Could Never Be a Paparazzi”

  1. says:

    Leaving your thumb in the shot means you can tell people, “I have a picture of me and Dolph Lundgren” and it’s still true…sort of. Geez, I have firsted you a few times on here now and I’m startin’ ta feel like a stalker. =P

  2. says:

    Does Dolph Lundgren still qualify as a ‘celebrity’? That’s like calling Ellen DeGeneres a dancer. (Shoutout to SNL for that last bit!)

  3. says:

    [quote comment="3569"]Does Dolph Lundgren still qualify as a ‘celebrity’? That’s like calling Ellen DeGeneres a dancer. (Shoutout to SNL for that last bit!)[/quote]

    He was in Rocky IV he will always be a celebrity in my mind

  4. says:

    Great work… You should say that you saw him holding another mans hand and sell it to the enquirer.

  5. says:

    who is he?

  6. says:

    LOL.. if you have to point out and circle the back of the celeb’s head that you captured.. maybe it’s best you’re a blogger and a comedian rather than an pap.

  7. says:

    The other day, someone found my site via Google by typing “Dolph Lundgren naked” and I place much of the blame on you. ;)

  8. says:

    Dolph Lundgren….wow, that’s a name my nightmares call when I sleep!

  9. says:

    ha ha ha. I have been there and done that. Luckily now I work at a 5 star hotel that we get a lot of celebs and I usually am able to grab an autograph or two, and maybe even a conversation.

  10. says:

    Hahaha….

    Well doesn’t Arkansas have the worst public schools in the country?..

  11. says:

    West Virginia is a good nominee. I surpirse Chris Hansen and his merry little band of cyber wizars aren’t all over this. Oh wait it istna rating month. never mind

  12. says:

    And they complain about us (Massachusetts) allowing gays to wed. Pfft!

  13. says:

    [quote comment="4565"]Hahaha….

    Well doesn’t Arkansas have the worst public schools in the country?..[/quote]

    Even if they didn’t it is still Arkansas

  14. says:

    [quote comment="4566"]West Virginia is a good nominee. I surpirse Chris Hansen and his merry little band of cyber wizars aren’t all over this. Oh wait it istna rating month. never mind[/quote]

    Give them a few weeks.

  15. says:

    [quote comment="4567"]And they complain about us (Massachusetts) allowing gays to wed. Pfft![/quote]

    well Tom Brady should be happy

  16. says:

    No wonder the Clintons left for New York. Can you picture a toothless guy coming up to their shack. “Howdy, I’m here fer yer daw-ter, Chil-C.”

  17. says:

    Oh, no! I hold my head in shame!!! Is this what one of my hometown states has resulted to? As if they weren’t a mockery already! I must run and hide now!
    :-) NN

  18. says:

    [quote comment="4571"]No wonder the Clintons left for New York. Can you picture a toothless guy coming up to their shack. “Howdy, I’m here fer yer daw-ter, Chil-C.”[/quote]

    Good one, John. And Kevin, get out of my head.

  19. says:

    Wow . . . being from Arkansas, can I just say, let the Arkansas jokes begin? It is embarrassing, but it’s fixable.

  20. says:

    Holy crap, let the trade in under-age children begin!

  21. says:

    Greetings from Dubai pointless banter – quality posts on here as always and we are laughing so hard at Finoa’s comment above….good job on letting it roll comment wise,

    We’d love to post this in your honour at GO! Smell the flowers – our regulars will love your blog – OK?

    Respect n Regards,

    Jim n Em aka GO! Smell the flowers.

  22. says:

    To funny Kev, long time no read so here I am again. Glad to see you are still keeping it funny.

  23. says:

    There are very few states that deserve to have an on-rush of pedophiles. Arkansas is one of them. I’ll also add Mississippi because you can’t make a joke about a Southern state being stupid without hearing something about Mississippi in there.

  24. says:

    Don’t they only marry their kin in West Virginia? Pedophiles could only wed their if they already had family there.

  25. says:

    We’ve got a few future Arkansonians in town, if we need to get the ball rolling. I’m sure other states will be happy to oblige!

  26. says:

    Hmm, I thought this was already a trend in some elite compounds in Utah. Maybe they’ll migrate to Arkansas and meet up with the mountain billies. An interbreeding adventure of sorts.

  27. says:

    Hey didn’t George Harrison marry some 13 year old ?? Lets just send them overseas where apparently it’s already legal!!

  28. says:

    What else do you expect from a state that enacted “Covenant marriages”, where it takes at least 2 years to get divorced if no children are involved and can take over 5 years if children are involved. That idea came from Presidential hopeful Mike Huckabee. I live in Arkansas and the marrying of the kin has died out except in the mountainous regions of the Ozarks (joking-I hope).

  29. says:

    I’m already preparing the greyhound fleet for those families that you want to get rid of in your neighborhood.
    A wall around Arkansas can go up faster than the border.

  30. says:

    I don’t think there was any mistake, they left the “not” out on purpose!

  31. says:

    Ooooppppsss!

    I have seen this happen in the Georgia Legislature a couple of times (but not on sexually related bills). Nobody pays attention in the heat of the session.

    And,besides, Walmart needs workers. How better to attract them than with juicy jailbait.

  32. says:

    [quote comment="4586"]Hey didn’t George Harrison marry some 13 year old ?? Lets just send them overseas where apparently it’s already legal!![/quote]

    George Harrison???????? Don’t you mean Jerry Lee Lewis? He was kicked out of the UK for being wed to his 13yr old cousin.

  33. says:

    okay seriously, this is great! isnt that what australia started out as though, like a dumping ground for rejects, and now they are like awesome so maybe it would be benificial to them!

  34. says:

    Those pedophiles would be like kids in candy store in Arkansas.

    Hmmm. An inappropriate turn of phrase, I fear.

  35. says:

    Now that was absolutely hilarious. Great post.

  36. says:

    [quote comment="4596"]Those pedophiles would be like kids in candy store in Arkansas.

    Hmmm. An inappropriate turn of phrase, I fear.[/quote]

    greatest.comment.ever

  37. says:

    That’s a smart finding. You have other interesting stuff here too. ^^

  38. says:

    I nominate Tennessee. Trust me, Tenn. would be first on the list… and I’m not just saying that because I’m from AR. ;) I swear.

  39. says:

    [quote comment="4565"]Hahaha….

    Well doesn’t Arkansas have the worst public schools in the country?..[/quote]

    Oh wow, you’re an idiot. We have no indoor plumbing and walk barefoot to our single classroom schools.

    If it happened anywhere else, you’d fault the writer–but Arkansas… Then you must fault the entire state.

  40. says:

    I hold my head in shame, being an Arkansan myself.

    Wait, does it count that I wasn’t actually born here?

  41. says:

    wow go Arkansas.

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