"Maybe it was a dream, you know, a very weird, bizarre, vivid, erotic, wet,
detailed dream. Maybe we have malaria."

Jun
19

An Ode To the Old Korean Lady Working at the Concession Stand at the Dodger Game

By: Bobby Finstock on 06/19/07 @ 5:06 am

My new friend,

Who knew that tucked away in the furthest corner of the loge level in the right field corner I would find you. A diamond in the rough, if you will. Someone that has probably been working for the Dodgers since they moved to LA from Brooklyn years ago.

Sure some might say that they moved you to this corner because of how slow you are as a worker. Or how you ruminate over the fact there was a little speckle of chewing gum on a debit card, making your production almost nil for minutes at a time. I look at these not as a detriment but as a little quirks that I could learn to love about you.

korean lady

Some might say that are 50 years of age difference isn’t socially acceptable, that a relationship between us two would never last. To the naysayers I say nay, our love will last an eternity. I knew it from the moment I could have switched to three different lines and still gotten my Dodger dog a full inning before I would have gotten it from you, yet I didn’t move.

There was something compelling about waiting for us to come into contact. Maybe it was alcohol, maybe it was the conversation I had with the person I was in line with, maybe it was because I would stare at the game on the television in front of me, or maybe I couldn’t be bothered by moving lines…. Maybe, just maybe, it was because I was transfixed on the way you move at a pace that makes people with no limbs look like Olympic sprinters.

My only regret is that I didn’t profess my love to you when I had my shining moment of ordering two dogs, two drinks, and an order of nachos with jalapenos on the side. Until we meet again Old Korean Lady working at the concession stand at a Dodger game in the right field corner on the loge level, until we meet again.

-Kevin

Don’t you hate getting in line and watching every single line move twice as fast around you?

Filed in: My Life

About the author

Bobby Finstock

Finstock is founder of Pointlessbanter.net. He is known for his encyclopedia like knowledge on the life and times of Scott Baio. In the future he hopes to write again under his own name in order to impress the ladies and build his celebrity to the levels of other failed internet writers.

74 Responses to “An Ode To the Old Korean Lady Working at the Concession Stand at the Dodger Game”

  1. says:

    [quote comment="4243"]It sounds like your nephew and my daughter would get along well. My daughter likes to pole dance, she picked it up after a visit with her father in NYC. I am not sure where they went for their day together, but I have decided supervised visits are the way to go.[/quote]\par
    \par
    I thought a father’s job was to keep his daughter off of the pole

  2. says:

    [quote comment="4247"][quote comment="4242"]I’m praying you never spawn…..the kid is going to need therapy in a few years.[/quote]\par
    \par
    I probably have already spawned I just don’t know it.[/quote]\par
    \par
    Wathc out world, is all I can think.

  3. says:

    First laugh of the day!\par
    \par
    Jeez, some of those terms are so stupid though. I’m still not getting the whole other language. Gimme pidgin any day!\par
    \par
    But I love to read them, especially when they teach you how to use it in a sentence.

  4. says:

    i especially like how in the urban dictionary reference they use “da” instead of “the”. way to “keep it real…yo.” geesh.

  5. says:

    omg…your nephew is going to be a bigger pimp then you, kev.

  6. says:

    Well I guess you’re never to young to learn what make it rain means. I’m just glad he can do it perfectly so when you do take him to the strip clubs you won’t have to show him how to do it. Good job Kevin!\par
    \par
    I wouldn’t say that it was the dumbest phrase I heard. The one I hate is when someone I haven’t seen in a while walks up to me and says “Damn girl I haven’t seen you in a minute.” It kinda makes me wanna bitch smack them up side their heads.

  7. says:

    It is still second, only to “Who’s your Daddy?”

  8. says:

    [quote comment="4248"][quote comment="4243"]It sounds like your nephew and my daughter would get along well. My daughter likes to pole dance, she picked it up after a visit with her father in NYC. I am not sure where they went for their day together, but I have decided supervised visits are the way to go.[/quote]\par
    \par
    I thought a father’s job was to keep his daughter off of the pole[/quote]\par
    \par
    \par
    Well I guess this father didn’t see it that way…haha.

  9. says:

    Moments like that, you will treasure forever…haha

  10. says:

    Well at least he is learning valuable informaiton he can share at pre-school!!

  11. says:

    To me,the dumbest phrase, is “Ghost ride the whip” Just look up some video’s online and you’ll see not only how dumb the phrase is, but also how dumb the people who do it are.

  12. says:

    You must be so proud! :)

  13. says:

    and thus, man invented scotchguard – the cum protector.

  14. says:

    I just saw some of the “Ghost ride the whip” videos on youtube. WOW. those people are fucking STUPID!\par
    \par
    I’m still in shock. I’ll think of something else to write later.

  15. says:

    Damn it! Why couldn’t I have answered the phone in time! It could have been me, Kevin. Not Barbie. Me.

  16. says:

    I’ve already forgotten. Is this your brother’s kid or your sister’s kid…Either way, his Mom needs to beat you with a shoe. lol\par
    \par
    Oh…Baio

  17. says:

    You forgot the rest of the line to \’e2\’80\’9cit\’e2\’80\’99s all fun and games until someone loses an eye\’e2\’80\’9d “then its freaking hiliarous!!”

  18. says:

    [quote comment="4244"]“Get er done”, maybe the most over used and dumbest in the last five years.quote]\par
    \par
    I’m putting my money on this one. Our governor of MT has an actual “Git er Done” award he gives out. Hilarious.

  19. says:

    [quote comment="4242"]I’m praying you never spawn…..the kid is going to need therapy in a few years.[/quote]\par
    I was just thinking the same thing…lol

  20. says:

    Yep, make it rain has to be one on the list…\par
    \par
    I’ve never made it rain in a strip club. Course, I haven’t been in one in 8 years…Not all that exciting…and yes, I do like hot naked women.

  21. says:

    *sigh* Ok Ok….I have to admit you’ve got a very valid point. Being that I have a korean mom, I completely feel your pain. Don’t let them get behind the wheel of a car either it’s enough to make you gauge your eyes out. Quick short story here, when I was living in Cali, hubby and I decided to drive up to WA to visit my folks…after a long 12 hr drive, we are about 5 minutes from my mom’s house when we get stuck behind some damn cadillac with some little old oriental lady behind the wheel! So, instead of getting there in 5, it took us twice as long and the whole time I’m cursing little old oriental drivers that have no business behind the wheel of a vehicle k? Well, seems this person was headed where we were headed LITERALLY pulling up into my parents driveway so all I can think is ” Pshhh it just had to be one of mom’s friends” right? NOOO…Kev, it was my MOTHER! *sigh* Damn those slightly tinted windows and short asian women

  22. says:

    That was cute! Poor kid.

  23. says:

    omg you are too much kev, lol you and ur nephew making it rain on chicks lol…. umm no make it rain isn’t the stupidest phrase in the past 5 years humm lemme see…. what it do shawty is dumb to me… what else what’s poppin???,anybody who does the lil jon/dave chappelle imatation of yeah that has been killed to death…i cant think of any more oh wait the birdman’s birdcall on every damm record not a phrase but made so irritating

  24. says:

    [...] seat of my car and that is the combination of our love juices. I am sure your daughter source: Teaching My Nephew Everything He Needs to Know…, [...]

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