Remember a few weeks back I wrote a blog poking fun at the whole Madeleine McCann situation, and how biased the press is? I know it created a lovely discussion on the MySpace version of my blog, you can read the comments for that blog here. The discussion there talked about the “cute white girl” card the media plays, along with the piss poor parenting skills of her parents, and the fact that her family also has a soci-economic status that a lot of other families don’t have.
In the comment section on my MySpace blog, English blogger Ckay made the following crack:
hey what gives shouldn’t there be some mother of twelve from middle America telling you how you can shove this post up your ass and how dare you try and make a joke of a mothers loss when you could never understand what being a parent is like. i feel lost without knowing that someone had taken an hour of their homeschooling to say that you were a twisted sycophant that was using this tragedy to make your own blog receive more hits, exploiting a horrific situation and how they usually find your blogs humorous (you know the stuff about anal, date rape and racism – that classy comedic gold) but they would be unsubscribing instantly and hoped you rot in hell. it just feels empty without it
We all got a good laugh because that is what usually occurs when I talk about any issue that rubs people the wrong way. Little did I know that this statement would be prophetic, because the hate mail and the comments keep rolling in on the post on here. Instead of mothers from middle America, I am getting a slew of people from England, and I have to say that I am totally disappointed.
Usually I love getting hate mail or nasty comments because it is never something that is well thought out or that makes a point. People write in all caps, they can’t spell, their grammar is worse than mine, and it usually has nothing to do with the actual post or the point of the post. That is what I expect from my typical American hate mail, the good old US of A does not disappoint when it comes to hate mail.
When I started getting hate mail from the UK though I was really saddened because the hate mail from over there actually contains worse spelling and the people are just as dumb as their American counterparts. It was like finding out Santa Clause wasn’t real, I expected all my hate mail from England to be like:
“Old Chap, I disagree with your writing and wish you would remove your commentary post haste. Chip, chip, cheerio… Lord Falkenberry.”
In my mind I imagined the person writing it would look something like:
However, my preconceived notions were totally wrong I must say. Here is a shining example of English hate mail:
Dude….wats the point in complaining about it??
fair do’s u sed ur sick of the press coverage….. but you write sumfing
on here and just expect people to agree with you….i meen…..ur views are
obviously stereotypical of Americans being complete fucktards and stuck
up their own ass’s. A 4 year old girl has been abducted…… a 4 year
old…..and the best thing you can do is bitch about how much people are
helping and publicising it.
It has nothin to do with her being a ” cute white” girl….cos most 4
year old girls…regardless of race, hair colour, are “cute”… So what are
we supossed to do?? just stop publicising it because there has been too
much press coverage??
Good times. Somewhere Shakespeare is shaking his head after this guy gave the English language a giant mushroom tattoo.
You see I never wanted to imagine that all my hate mail from the UK would be written by Vinnie Jones:
I wanted to believe that soccer hooligans couldn’t write. To make things worse instead of hearing it in my head in a proper accent, I now hear one of the Gallagher brothers from Oasis reading it to me in a drunken Manchester slur.
Out freaking standing….
So thanks once again England for totally disappointing me, just because of that I am going to do a Princess Di car crash blog out of spite.
Oh, I almost forgot the most ironic thing about this, want to know how they are finding the blog posting? They are googling “random fat kid” images on google. (I used a picture from randomfatkids.com in that blog.) So I am being judged by hundreds of people googling for random fat kids… Uh…
To my American readers: Do you envision the English to be prim and proper or a bunch of drunken hooligans from Manchester?
To my Worldwide readers: Do you envision Americans to be fat dudes from Texas or normal sized, stupid, and from Texas?