Every Time I go to Wal-Mart My Thoughts on Genocide Change
Sunday I had to make a trip to Wal-mart to pick up a few small plastic storage boxes. For most people that is just a small task, for me… well let me just say I avoid Wal-Mart like Richard Simmons avoids vagina. I will make an effort to go to four separate stores and pay more money just so I don’t have to spend time in Wal-Mart. Some people refuse to shop there for some grand political reason, I wish that were the case for me, I just utterly despise everyone that is in there shopping.
Everything I don’t like about people comes to the forefront when I go to Wal-Mart; rudeness, idiocy, lack of personal hygiene, inability to understand the cart flow in a shopping aisle, and unattended kids. This trip had all of this plus an added bonus…
Usually when I go to Wally World I sneak in through the Automotive Center or Lawn and Garden, where there is rarely a line to check out. This time though I was thrown a curve ball with Lawn and Garden being closed and the automotive cashier making a key… Wait let me change that, the automotive girl was trying to figure out how to get a key off of the key chain in order to make the key. You could have dropped an Eskimo in front of a tanning bed and they would have picked up the general idea faster than this girl.
Begrudgingly I headed to the front of the store, where like always, long lines awaited me. I only had four boxes, so I decided to roll the dice and attempt to go through the self checkout line. Now self checkout is always a mixed bag, you never know what you are going to get. Sometimes you will get fast, efficient people, that you can just tell have an IQ above a squeezable ketchup bottle. Other times you have people that still think a microwave is too complex to have in the home, so self checkout is like some high priestess voodoo to them.
I had three viable options for self checkout lines:
Line 1- A group home outing, where a girl with down syndrome was sitting in the cart opening all their packages and playing with the items. I knew that was going to be a total mess, so I passed.
Line 2- There were people just finishing ringing out and then there were three deaf people engaged in an argument. Now I know you are thinking, “They are deaf, how did you know they were in an argument?” Well, they all had nasty facial expressions and there was a crispness to their signing, where you could actually hear the flesh smacking the flesh. Kind of like a guy angrily masturbating after having blue balls for three hours… Onto the next line.
Line 3- A women and her child were in the next line they had about nine items, I figured that I had struck gold. However, the lady decided to let her child ring out the items, which was a production that one had to see to believe. By the time they were done the retarded cart girl had constructed an interplanetary space ship and the deaf people had learned to hear. I seriously wanted to stop the lady and her kid, ask her what grade her son was going into, then tell her that she probably should hold him back by at least two years. There is no way I could attempt to explain what he was doing. Maybe the kid thought when it beeped you needed to scan the same item four times? I don’t know…
Now I must go and rinse the stench of Wal-Mart off of me and drink a bottle of Jack Daniels. At least I know that I have probably another year before I have to make my return there, just enough time for me to recover.
What is your least favorite thing about shopping?
That’s why I don’t let my kid ring out items. He asks, I say no, end of story. He can ring out items when he’s the one paying for them. I also don’t shop at walmart cause they’re facist dickheads. Worst experience I’ve had shopping was there, when some pharmy decided not to hand me my birth control pills because it was against HIS religion.\par
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Then there’s my worst checkout girl experience, getting this downs syndrome couple in every saturday trying to buy fifty things with a buck fifty. I’m sorry, you have money for the bubblegum, the jujubees, OR the toothpaste. Not all three. Every. Fricking. Week.
AND Walmort sells guns.\par
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(no typo)
i wish that i could read this….but it doesnt show up on my phone :c
[quote comment="3271"]Well, I personally feel the same way..HATE Walmart. BUT, I do enjoy watching women lose it on thier kids and beat them..LOL.[/quote]\par
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Now that is a toss up
I am taking sign language and what lane did you end up picking?\par
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Plus when is Arizona going to be home to Kevin?
I absolutely hate walmart. I hate it because I worked there and they treat you like shit. I avoid going there but my father loves it so I end up there once or twice a week. I go through the self check out and if somsone is slow I offer to help and end up getting them out of there in under 2 mins. Walmart is the worst place to shot because people are rude and they just dont care if you are in a hurry or if they are blocking your way or if their kids are running wild. If you hate shopping there imagine being employed by them. I think everyone should boycott walmart and help run them out of business. When Sam Walton first started it he never wanted it to be like this. I think if he was still alive he would probably close most of them down and re do them.
Yeah I work at wally word and hate the one I work at because it seem like all they can hire is fucking morons any more. And most generally the people that shop there are morons too.
I really hate Walmart, but sometimes I have to pick up food items there when the money is tight. Gas is up, so prices are really high at my favorite grocery store. What I dislike most about shopping there? The lines are hellacious (I guess that’s universal) and the bathroom nearest to me always seems to be closed for cleaning when I need it. I’m always tired when I’m there and I already get enough exercise, I don’t like having to do another 2 miles just to use the bathroom.
I hate Wally World just like everyone else. My local one sells guns, but no alcohol as it’s in a dry city. I’ve only been there recently to show my visiting rellies the enormity of the place and the guns. Sadly, it was late at night so the guns weren’t available, but they did get to see the 9mm hollow point ammo which disturbed them enough. Actually what disturbed my sis the most was that I left a fingerprint on the glass of the ammo cabinet as I was pointing them out. She was convinced it was going to be robbed and I’d be arrested for it.\par
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Kroger for groceries, Target for everything else. And if I can’t get what I want at either of those then I buy online.
Well I have to speak up for myself because I shop at WalMart quite frequently and I’m not stupid as so many have implied. What exactly is stupid about shopping at a store that has almost anything you need for extremely low prices? I can buy my groceries, hemp, and underwear all at the same time. You can’t really beat that. I care not about the political side of things. In fact people who cry about WalMart and refuse to shop there for ‘political reasons’ make me want to puke.\par
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Moving on….\par
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There is a trick to shopping at the WalMart. Go anytime between midnite and 7 am. You basically have the place to yourself. There likely won’t be any self-checkout lanes open but at least there aren’t horribly long lines at the regular cash registers.
[quote comment="3253"]The people that shop at wal-mart on a regular basis are just further proof that stupid people should not be allowed to breed.[/quote]\par
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i shop at wal mart everytime i need something for the house, but im kind of forced to. i live in an area where you have to drive 30 or so miles to the nearest target (and im not driving that far for freezer bags or small shit like that). small towns suck. there is a mom and pop grocery store and walmart in my town. god how i hate it
You think Walmart is bad? Try ASDA in Wrexham (U.K.) It is the size of a shoe box with the same amount of people in it as you would find in Walmart on a Saturday (probably. Maybe more.) It took me five minutes to cross from one side of the isle to the other, three steps in all, and I am not exaggerating. I started thinking of automatic weaponry. Never again. In the U.k. there is at least one rat within 12ft of every person and they are considered vermin. In ASDA there was at least 20 people within 12ft of me. Hmmmmm. >:)
If you compare prices most of the time Target is the same or better… I ALWAYS go to Target. If it’s in the middle of the night… then it’s Meijer.
i just hate shopping at walmart in general. Thank god Target is closer than Walmart. I work there now though so I have no choice but to go. But at least I work in the back in the freezer at night. No contact with the idiot people who come in that late. If I do have to shop in walmart, I try to do all my shopping fast and go through self-checkout since I just do it really fast anyways, than make my way out of there like a bat out of hell lol.
Hahahahahaha this is the funniest damn thing I have seen all day! But I know exactly where you are coming from! I was on a long road trip this past weekend and arrived pretty late to my destination. I needed to pick up some items for the morning so I decided to stop in at one of those 24 hour Super Wal Marts on my way in to town. When they say the freaks come out at night, they ain’t kiddin! Mind you it is about 1 in the morning, but I swear with the people working there and the people that were shopping there, for groceries no less, I felt like I was transported straight into the twilight zone. This family of people looked like they all came from the same gene pool. There were about 20 of them all in different lines buying a host of crazy crap that the average person would never dream of buying at Wal Mart…needless to say the incident has forever scarred me for life…
well…. i gotta admit, i love 24 hour walmart… as i can go there at 4 am… and get everything… and not have to deal with anyone but the re-stockers and their boxes…..\par
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and i gotta say… i loved the richard simmons thang… that was too good…..
Where I live the Wal-Marts are different than the ones up in MA, which looks exactly like you describe only nobody speaks English. You can see women lose it on their kids in different languages. I did experience a group home thing too, I was stuck behind one.\par
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The ones here are 24 hours, clean, have groceries and all sorts of stuff. People have teeth. It is really not bad. I haven’t seen unsupervised children there. However, they are a plenty in my apartment complex. One kid followed me in my house, behind my dogs. He was 3. The mom could barely care.\par
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I take better care of my dogs.
Great post… my sentiments on Wal-Mart exactly. At least I can say that I’m always entertained when I go- which is rare. Wouldn’t random videos of trips to Wal-Mart make a great documentary?