An International Incident Waiting to Happen

I suggest not doing the OK symbol with your hand. My mom did it once to a french waiter. He was not too pleased considering that he kept coming back to the table, each time smelling worse and worse of B.O. Wait, ask them if they sell deo over there.

Don’t use the words “randy” or “stuffed.” I learned that in Australia. Crazy sex fiends.\par
\par
Also, for the record, I saw Kevin the Bushman yesterday and if his unshaven face is any indication that he’s been overwhelmed, then yea. Trust. He’s a mess.\par
;o)

\’e2\’80\’9cVoulez vous coucher avec moi” roughly means will you sleep with me

maybe I do need to learn that phrase…\par
\par
I am no longer the bushman I just got a hair cut and I am going to shave my lovely face soon.

Anyone who can figure out the cross-pollination of an Oompa Loompa and Mama Cass is alright in my book.

I used to work at Staples. Weird.

That is quite the story. I am picturing Jim Carrie scrubbing himself in the shower after he finds out the police chief that was kissing him was a guy (in Pet Detective).\par
Did your rat girl ploy work?\par
Cool blog, I’ll have to check out some more later.

Remind me to go have sex with my husband in gratitude for marrying me at the ripe age of 20.\par
\par
\par
And I’ll just read your dating stories as reminders of why I never want to get a divorce. Ever.\par
\par
Very funny.

Random comment - Have you read I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell by Tucker Max? If not, you should I think you would laugh.

Hmmmm rat girl or the orange fatty….. seems your choice was a hard one, even if you werent.

I loved your love child example…Laughed out Loud. Nice to see male date rape getting some attention. They should do some PSA’s on that using nerdy D list celebs. Dustin Diamond your time is now…

about the LOTTA comment. I was just going to say “sounds like a tucker max story to me.” You both are a lot alike.

I might could’ve handled the blow job (if I kept my eyes closed) but if she’d had wanted anything else…\par
\par
Hell nawww.\par
\par
Great post dude! The “NO MEANS NO!!” had me laughin’

I worked at Staples during my breaks in college. Let me tell you, there was not ONE person I would even have considered talking to outside of work, much less molesting.

I don’t know but this post fills me with glee. But what’s wrong with banging Oompa Loompas? They’re chipper and clean.

For the last line alone: I love you

If you would’ve though to take the Staples cash, we probably wouldn’t be reading this today, so I guess that kind of worked out for me.

Now that I’ve had the good fortune of reading a few of your blog posts, I’d have to say you. You’re hilarious.

Well thanks Betty I appreciate it, tell a friend or ten.

Your site has won a Blog of the Day Award (BOTDA)\par
\par
Award Code\par
\par
Thank you,\par
\par
famous quotes

Not a celebrity, per se, but I totally lost my shit on Sunday when I stepped on the field at Dodgers Stadium. I wept. And when I knelt on the grass, the security guard thought I had fainted and/or hurt myself and kept rapidly asking if I was ok. Haha.

I think I’d go googoo if I saw that girl who plays Sara Sidle on CSI - Jorja Fox?\par
\par
Something about her makes me want to create a crime scene just for her to investigate.\par
\par
Weird, eh?

No mark that is perfectly normal… I was going to make a semen stain joke here but uh… never mind…

The looks thing kinda works both ways, as maybe that’s why she was taken in the first place. I think the media hysteria has more to do with the fact that her parents are middle-class professionals, and so can co-ordinate a media campaign better than a working-class or black family could.\par
\par
I also noticed that on the day they showed that video of Madeleine at football grounds, the BBC dropped the story down the news. I think even they got pissed off with it in the end, because it’s like they were trying to manipulate the news.

um yeah, i haven’t even heard anything about this, maybe I should turn on CNN more often. Who the hell is she!?

ok so i just googled it. What kind of parents leave 3 kids under the age of 3 in an apt BY THEMSELVES?

Fuck…there’s a special place in hell for you, huh Kevin?\par
\par
See you there…

Latisha Jackson isn’t missing. She’s at her cousin Leroy’s house. That’s how rumors get started.

Eee! Walton Goggins is from a suburb of my town, and I have worked with him before, and he is awesome and nice. So there. I’m glad he was nice to you.

I have to agree with Mark.\par
\par
Hell.\par
\par
For eternity.\par
\par
And you know Angela Jackson will be there. Waiting. For you.

[quote comment="3082"]The looks thing kinda works both ways, as maybe that’s why she was taken in the first place. I think the media hysteria has more to do with the fact that her parents are middle-class professionals, and so can co-ordinate a media campaign better than a working-class or black family could.\par
\par
I also noticed that on the day they showed that video of Madeleine at football grounds, the BBC dropped the story down the news. I think even they got pissed off with it in the end, because it’s like they were trying to manipulate the news.[/quote]\par
\par
Yeah I totally did over look the whole wealth thing, that does play into it.

[quote comment="3084"]ok so i just googled it. What kind of parents leave 3 kids under the age of 3 in an apt BY THEMSELVES?[/quote]\par
\par
I didn’t even realize until today that they left the three kids in the room by themselves… Parents of the year I guess.

[quote comment="3085"]Fuck…there’s a special place in hell for you, huh Kevin?\par
\par
See you there…[/quote]\par
\par
I plan on driving the bus

[quote comment="3086"]Latisha Jackson isn’t missing. She’s at her cousin Leroy’s house. That’s how rumors get started.[/quote]\par
\par
That was totally irresponsible blogging on my part

[quote comment="3092"]I have to agree with Mark.\par
\par
Hell.\par
\par
For eternity.\par
\par
And you know Angela Jackson will be there. Waiting. For you.[/quote]\par
\par
Do you think she puts out?

Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan or any other member of the slut brigade.

I have to admit I have a weakness for Lohan, well before she got hopped up on the coke.

I prefer Rodriguez to Tarantino myself. And I have to agree with Ashley regarding Lohan. I must admit I’m hopped up on Diet coke and going commando.

I can say with full authority that I am better than William Katt. And it feels good.

Ironically enough, I had just taken a swig of my adult beverage when I read “NO MEANS NO!” and I damn near spit it all over my computer screen!\par
\par
Hilarious post!\par
\par
p.s. - I think living 2 days without your car was worth it to make it out of that situation with your dignity intact.\par
\par
p.s.s. - Assuming that hollering “NO MEANS NO!” is considered dignified… ;)~\par
\par
- Aaron

I wear sweats in public sometimes. *hangs head in shame*

[quote comment="3134"]I wear sweats in public sometimes. *hangs head in shame*[/quote]\par
\par
There is a support group for that

Do you have Rosario’s digits? Please hook me up… that’s one lady I like…

After seeing his last movie, I don’t think Tarantino has much to be proud of lately.

[quote comment="3155"]After seeing his last movie, I don’t think Tarantino has much to be proud of lately.[/quote]\par
\par
The worst thing is he extended it with more dialog at Cannes

God thats a great pic of rosario..so hot..

You make me sick.\par
\par
You disgust me.\par
\par
How can you say these things about a little girl who has been taken for god-knows what reason.\par
\par
I hope you burn in hell.

[quote comment="3216"]You make me sick.\par
\par
You disgust me.\par
\par
How can you say these things about a little girl who has been taken for god-knows what reason.\par
\par
I hope you burn in hell.[/quote]\par
\par
Way to totally not read the post and what it is about. How is it not true that the press coverage is unbalanced and slanted?

I have to agree that the aforementioned “slut brigade” makes me feel better as a person. I am not dried up, coked out bone rack. I am nice to people. I am not rich but I have done things for charity and donate often. I value life more than they do, obviously. But, compared to them, who doesn’t?

You think it’s annoying for you Kev? We have to put up with Madeline this and Madeline that 24/7 here in the UK!\par
\par
Seriously. I can’t even turn on the TV without an advert to help find her. Who the fuck cares and why the hell hasn’t this amount of effort gone into locating more important people like Bambi Woods?!\par
\par
Fuck.

WTF? This is total bollocks, one three year old goes missing and everyones a fucking hero. Posters, ads, fundraisers etc? Why the would you need a fundraiser?\par
\par
I’ll start giving a shit when we start giving 1.5 million rewards for all the other missing children, or when we start feeding all the starving kids in Africa.

[quote comment="3615"]WTF? This is total bollocks, one three year old goes missing and everyones a fucking hero. Posters, ads, fundraisers etc? Why the would you need a fundraiser?\par
\par
I’ll start giving a shit when we start giving 1.5 million rewards for all the other missing children, or when we start feeding all the starving kids in Africa.[/quote]\par
\par
\par
EXACTLY

you are one sicko you know that. i hope u burn in hell. i hope that madlelein mccann is found safe and well and will always have hope for her parents i suport them fully its just a shame that sickos like you and the person that took madeleine exist. I think its a shame that chilldren get kidnapped (including ALL children) but its adults fault look at what we have done to the world, bring back the electric chair i say and fry the pedos its what they all deserve

[quote comment="3749"]you are one sicko you know that. i hope u burn in hell. i hope that madlelein mccann is found safe and well and will always have hope for her parents i suport them fully its just a shame that sickos like you and the person that took madeleine exist. I think its a shame that chilldren get kidnapped (including ALL children) but its adults fault look at what we have done to the world, bring back the electric chair i say and fry the pedos its what they all deserve[/quote]\par
\par
First of all use a spell check, second of all you TOTALLY missed the point of this blog, but judging by your spelling you are a tad thick so it isn’t surprising.

there is nothing wrong with my spelling thanks, cept for the u which is shorthand for you so looks like im not the thicko and as far as i can tell this site is just for weirdo’s who have nothing better to do than take the piss out of an innocent family so dont patronize me you little prick. but then your prob american so cant help it as it always seems to be the americans that are having a go at the mccans on all the sites i have noticed like they are innocent and all. the pillar of the world and all.

well u seem a bit of an asshole to me, are you american by any chance as it always seems to be the americans having a go at the mccanns i have noticed. Like they are so innocent i mean their country has the highest pedo rate so lets not forget that before they call the english people neglectful. and if that seems a tad racist i dont really care as i think its shocking that everyone is having a go at the mccanns and sites like this exist. i cant see the point to this blog no, your right. It doesnt seem to have one really except sarcasm. its of no help what so ever and it shows only one thing, that whoever made it obviously doesnt have a heart, as if they did they would understand that the mccanns are going through hell and to many young children have been kidnapped.\par
\par
and as for my spelling its fine i missed one e of madeleines name which is the keyboards fault and u is short for you what can i say youth culture its annoying but catching. so dont patronize me as im not really to fussed about the spelling it just shows how sad you are, i typed all that and you picked up on the spelling.\par
\par
post whatever reply you want i will NOT be returning to this site as wouldnt waste my time with you anymore, so have fun saddo.

and how sad are you anyhow kevin you only quote everyone. litteraly can you not reply, you have to repeat everything everyone says. like i said very sad lmao

Mark you are truly a fucking idiot.\par
\par
The point of this post is that the only reason that this girl is getting this much press coverage is because she is white and cute. In fact she is getting so much press coverage it is a determent to the thousands of other kids that go missing a day.\par
\par
If she was A) BLACK\par
B) NOT CUTE\par
\par
There would be little to no press coverage.\par
\par
So instead of arguing on a blog that you clearly don’t understand the point behind go to the dentist or start searching for her. Instead of googling it and trying to figure out where she is.

well i can understand your point i suppose but i still think that its a heartless way of putting it. and dont you think by madeleine getting all this attention other missing children are getting more attention as i saw a program on telly before for madeleine and they gave 2 min post for 4 other children 3 girls and one boy that are also missing so they are recieving more attention and one of which was a black girl. i justthink there is to many unhelpful posts in the world and i still stand by my opinions about both 1 your an asshole and 2 americans are full of themselves. i dont really care it has to be said and if other people are allowed to say whatever they want on her i will. and i know i said i wasnt coming back but i was a bored and b curious before you comment me on that.

They aren’t getting attention Mark. Your telling me that I need to see missing posters here in the US or on our news? There aren’t any local kids that are missing?\par
\par
Lets see if Beckham cuts a promotion next time another kid goes missing that is from England.\par
\par
It is bullshit, it comes down to: her looks, her race, and the fact that her parents have money.\par
\par
Please stop coming here and butchering the English language. I don’t care if you think I am an asshole, this is satire, you don’t like it don’t read it.

I think it is a total disgrace what most of yee are saying!!!!!! Are yee not happy that about time there is publicity for a missing child!!???\par
I hope every single one of yee rot in hell cause yee deserve it!!!!!\par
This young girl who is totally innocent has been kidnapped, it is her who deserves a chance in this life and she certainly doesnt need pricks like yee who clearly are heartless pricks criticize every bit of help and publicity there is out there for her!!!!!\par
So Shut the F*CK up all of yee and say a prayer for HER!!!!!

Your so petty too about the only reason this & that….. Every Child is cute and beautiful in their own rights! Basically your actually discriminating against her because she is a “cute” child!!!!\par
Get a life seriously!!!!!\par
\par
\par
Everybody PLEASE just remember that she is an innocent child who DIDNT ask for any of this!!!!!\par
Grow up you toal spastick!!!!!!!

I totally agree with the point made in this blog. It’s good that she’s getting so much attention, but it’s not fair to all the other children out there that are missing. I’d rather have the police searching for a child that was rudely abducted from her house than having them search for a child in Portugal which was left alone by her parents in an apartment. The way I see it they already have half the perpetrators, the parents. It was exactly the same with Natalee Holloway. I really hope that people would just let this go and face the fact that she’s probably dead by now, or has gone into a network of illegal adoption or child prostitution. It’s really harsh, and I think it’s just as horrible as you think it is. But let’s be fair to all the other children that have been abducted or worse.\par
\par
However, I do feel that you totally raped your own statement by posting the paragraph about the ugly children. You could’ve really done that and could’ve made a very good point. Instead, you chose for a humorous approach and totally took the power and credibility out of the original statement.

[quote comment="3852"]\par
\par
However, I do feel that you totally raped your own statement by posting the paragraph about the ugly children. You could’ve really done that and could’ve made a very good point. Instead, you chose for a humorous approach and totally took the power and credibility out of the original statement.[/quote]\par
\par
I write a HUMOR blog.. I use HUMOR to pick apart things that I see wrong in society. I don’t get on a political soapbox and bitch about things, I use humor to jab at things that I think are wrong

[quote comment="3848"]I think it is a total disgrace what most of yee are saying!!!!!! Are yee not happy that about time there is publicity for a missing child!!???\par
I hope every single one of yee rot in hell cause yee deserve it!!!!!\par
This young girl who is totally innocent has been kidnapped, it is her who deserves a chance in this life and she certainly doesnt need pricks like yee who clearly are heartless pricks criticize every bit of help and publicity there is out there for her!!!!!\par
So Shut the F*CK up all of yee and say a prayer for HER!!!!![/quote]\par
\par
Some people are so stupid that they shouldn’t be alive, you would fall into that category

[quote comment="3849"]Your so petty too about the only reason this & that….. Every Child is cute and beautiful in their own rights! Basically your actually discriminating against her because she is a “cute” child!!!!\par
Get a life seriously!!!!!\par
\par
Everybody PLEASE just remember that she is an innocent child who DIDNT ask for any of this!!!!!\par
Grow up you toal spastick!!!!!!![/quote]\par
\par
Your logic is so flawed… You don’t think that her coverage has anything to do with her parents money, her looks, or her skin color?

this site makes me sick\par
i am quite aware of the media hype over poor little madeline and i am quite aware of many other childrens cases who havent been fully established in the medias eye which i understand isnt fair but jus because one little “cute, white” girl gets a lot of media attention over some one else does not make it her fault. my heart goes out to madeline and her family and to other abducted children such as alexandria winship-write, a cute and white 3 year old girl, or even sariyah adorno a 0ne year old baby who was also abducted. i actually do not see the pointe in this website i know it says pointless banter but this could just hurt so many people for no particular reason i mean the way i came onto this site was through a picture i found which appalled me lable ‘randomfatkid’ actually i dont even know why im writing ne more to such a pointless n heartless sight. you ultimately revolt me, your the lowest of the low

[quote comment="3861"]this site makes me sick\par
i am quite aware of the media hype over poor little madeline and i am quite aware of many other childrens cases who havent been fully established in the medias eye which i understand isnt fair but jus because one little “cute, white” girl gets a lot of media attention over some one else does not make it her fault. my heart goes out to madeline and her family and to other abducted children such as alexandria winship-write, a cute and white 3 year old girl, or even sariyah adorno a 0ne year old baby who was also abducted. i actually do not see the pointe in this website i know it says pointless banter but this could just hurt so many people for no particular reason i mean the way i came onto this site wa