One thing I have come to notice in my life is that when you stay at someone’s home as a guest, as a hookup, or possibly as home invader taking a shower there for the first time is one of the most complex tasks you do in life. Taking hotels or motels out of the equation, showering at a new place is always something that adds at least 15 minutes to me getting ready. There are so many issues that come into play with this:
How do you turn this thing on?
For five minutes before you jump in the shower you have to examine the apparatus. Why is it that nobody else ever has remotely the same plumbing as you do? For whatever reason when you shower at a new place they always have one major issue that you aren’t used to. Maybe it is the one knob setup that you can never figure out how to adjust the temperature properly. Possibly they have the random way to turn the water from the faucet to the shower that you have never seen, like pulling the head of the faucet down. Then there is always the chance that they have the extreme oddity of having the plumbing reversed, where hot is cold and cold is hot.
Any of these little differences always takes some time to overcome. The thing is you don’t want to keep experimenting by turning the water off and on because you don’t want the people in the house to ask what the hell you are doing. Of course you could be stuck with something that has multiple shower heads and hi tech temperature regulators for the built in sauna. These are two things that are so mind boggling that I usually end up taking a bath in the sink.
The water pressure surprise
Finding out what their water pressure in their shower actually is… well it’s kind of like waiting to see what the results of your HIV test are. There is anticipation and dread all at the same time. You are sitting there hoping that it won’t dribble out of the head and when they have awesome water pressure you feel like you won a small prize.
Is it considered rude to piss in a somebody else’s shower?
One of the small moral debates we must have with ourselves at one point in our lives will arise and how will you act?
Which personal hygiene product is right for you?
First of all why is it when you shower at a different place they have approximately 15 different kind of hair care products in their shower, when at home you have like two? Of course they are never what you have, so you spend the next five minutes reading the different bottles. Here is where the self evaluation begins… Do you have damaged hair? Dandruff? Should you use a product for hair with coloring support even though you don’t have coloring? What about this shampoo for curly hair when you have straight hair? How much shine and bounce do you want? Do you use the all in one shampoo or do you use a separate shampoo and conditioner? Then you have to evaluate the smell, are you going to smell like a chick if you are using this strawberry kiwi blend?
All of this is too much…. I haven’t even begun to talk about the guessing game that is, “how much can I poop without worrying about clogging their toilet.” That is like Russian roulette for house guests.
Is it me or is this something we all go through? Share your strange shower stories with me…