"Maybe it was a dream, you know, a very weird, bizarre, vivid, erotic, wet,
detailed dream. Maybe we have malaria."


As a history major I have been lied to

By: Bobby Finstock on 04/11/07 @ 6:23 am

(Just a quick note, thanks for everyone that called in and watched yesterday. I should have the trimmed down version sometime next week and I will post it in a blog. So yes you will get to watch the highlights of my appearance on ring my bell or lowlights depending on your point of view.)

When I signed up to be a history major I always felt like I was going to see and read some really interesting things. However I have come to the realization that I have been utterly lied to and I haven’t studied anything of interest. Here is a list of things I thought we would have learned about:

Point 1- I just read The Trial and Death of Socrates and there was no mention of the time he spent in the phone booth with Billy the Kid.

Point 2- Nothing about Napolean’s love for Ice Cream treats nor his time at Ziggy Pig.

bill and ted

Point 3- In all my study of Pearl Harbor I have yet to find anything about Ben Affleck and how he totally took out the Japanese.

Point 4-
Marie Antoinette did not have a snaggle tooth, nor did she have a pair of pink converse in her bedroom.


Point 5- Lou Diamond Phillips did not ride with Billy the Kid, but he did die in a plane crash with the Big Bopper.

Point 6- Nobody had sex in a car on the Titanic… But apparently Leo lived instead of freezing to death in the ocean.

Point 7- Chuck Berry did not pick up his sound from Marty McFly and his legendary performance at the The Enchantment Under the Sea Dance.

What was something that you have you thought was factual that you learned from tv or movies and when you got older you found it to be totally made up?

Tomorrow- “I’ll take the(rapists) for 1000 Alex”


I am going to be in Phoenix this weekend for the Phoenix Film Festival. My friend has a film showing Saturday night at 10:30. If you would like to come to the showing and meet up for a drink before or after send me a message.

Filed in: Pop Culture

About the author

Bobby Finstock

Finstock is founder of Pointlessbanter.net. He is known for his encyclopedia like knowledge on the life and times of Scott Baio. In the future he hopes to write again under his own name in order to impress the ladies and build his celebrity to the levels of other failed internet writers.

One Response to “As a history major I have been lied to”

  1. Vadella says:

    What an excellent idea…. I was laughing so hard. :D

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