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Which is more embarrassing?

By: Bobby Finstock on 02/28/07 @ 6:19 am

Simple premise for today’s blog. I am going to tell you two stories, which may or may not have happened to me, I am going to change the name of the person in both stories to “Kyle” just to protect the innocent. After reading both stories go ahead and comment but let me know which story you think is more embarrassing.

Story 1-

Kyle wasn’t feeling so well, but he went to class anyways because it was the first week of school. In between his second and third class of the day Kyle decided to go to a Mexican restaurant and order a huge ass Chimichanga.


After sitting in the restaurant for a bit and doing some reading Kyle got into his car to return to school. While sitting in traffic Kyle had to fart, which ended up being a shart and now he had soiled himself. Kyle now sitting in his own feces returned home to have his parents question why he wasn’t in class, with the run through now visible on the back of his pants Kyle explain that he sharted. Since his parents did not know what the term shart was, Kyle was them forced to stand there and explain what the hell he was talking about. Finally Kyle took a shower and fired off an e-mail to his professor explaining that he was sick.

Story 2-

Kyle was visiting his girlfriend at the time at her college. After a fun day of hanging out Kyle was excited to get laid for the first time in months. Sadly his girlfriend Martha’s roommate was in the room, albeit asleep and Martha didn’t want to fool around because she felt uncomfortable with it. Kyle kept trying and eventually Martha told him to just go to sleep. About a half an hour later Martha was awaken from her sleep because she kept getting poked in the side. She woke up to see it was Kyle’s elbow hitting her over and over. Kyle was beating his meat with his sock around his penis for easy cleanup with her roommate staring from across the room in horror.


Martha didn’t even let Kyle finish and started yelling at him, her roommate did a fake wake up and pretended to be out of it not knowing what is going on.

Which was the more embarrassing story?

About the author

Bobby Finstock

Finstock is founder of Pointlessbanter.net. He is known for his encyclopedia like knowledge on the life and times of Scott Baio. In the future he hopes to write again under his own name in order to impress the ladies and build his celebrity to the levels of other failed internet writers.

3 Responses to “Which is more embarrassing?”

  1. says:

    Sharting seems a lot more excusable than masturbation because it’s generally unintentional. I’m going to say getting caught beating your meat, er I mean “Kyle” getting caught, would be much more humiliating.

  2. Jason says:

    I would have to agree with the first guy. Though I sharted at a wedding and had to ask for a ride home so I could change and before my friend would take me she made me show her. Bitch.

  3. punxxi says:

    must be shart bcos masterbating is a normal thing to do

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