The five most unrealistic tv shows ever

I decided to rank the top five most unrealistic sitcoms ever.

So here are the rules though. Shows that could just never happen… Like “Small Wonder”, “Alf”, “Mork and Mindy”, and “The Munsters” are just disqualified from this argument. As well as cartoons… and anything starring Ted McGinley.

I am also going to disqualify “Gilligan’s Island” just because I want to. I mean really do I even have to touch upon the professors inventions? Or the fact that they were always clean? Or even the fact that Mary Ann or Ginger were not pregnant after the first year,
because let’s face it someone would have had to sleep with them. You know Thurston would have made an offer that Ginger couldn’t refuse.

Also all shows that were on the TGIF ABC Lineup are removed from consideration because I think Bob Sagat is the Anti-christ. It can’t be
confirmed, nor do I have proof but he was on the two most annoying television shows EVER… “Full House” and “America’s Funniest Home
Videos”. No his appearance in “Half Baked” did not redeem him… So here are my rankings of the top five most unrealistic sitcoms ever.

1) The Cosby Show- It is just impossible for Claire to finish her law degree if you logically think about it. She would have had Sandra when she was like 22 or 23 so she was just finishing up her undergrad then Denise and Theo four and six years later, so she would have been in law school with three kids and a husband in medical school, just impossible. With today’s online learning technology
maybe, but the loopholes in their history are too great for me to overcome.

Redeeming quality about the show- The monopoly money episode where Cliff was explaining why Theo should go to college. Plus the idea of Lisa Bonet being on stage after she was in “Wild Orchid” and while she was sleeping with Lenny Kravitz. It was like they weren’t 100 sure what to do with her. I can only imagine the discomfort on the set after everyone there had seen her naked in “Wild Orchid”. Good times.

2) Cheers- Sam Malone, a former crappy pitcher, for the Boston Red Sox opens a bar and hilarity ensues. Not so fast. Let me recreate what would have been the first day that Sam Malone opened “Cheers”.

(Two Irish looking guys with Boston Red Soxs hats come into the bar. They look like they have had a hard day of manual labor, possibly
construction workers.)

Sam: (putting coasters in front of them) Welcome to Cheers boys what can I get you?

Mickey: (in a thick south Boston accent) Two Sam Adams.

Sully: Hey wait a minute aren’t you Sammy Malone? You used to pitch for the saaaaaaawks?

Sam: Why yes I am. Let me get that order for you.

Mickey: That is a wicked pissah.

Sully: Sam Malone was one of the worst pitchers in Boston history.

Mickey: Remember that game against the yanks in 79 where he blew a three run lead?

Sully: That would have put us over the top in the division.

(Sam is at the other end of the bar picking up on a hot blonde wearing a Yankees t-shirt. Sully and Mickey look down at the end of the
bar and then at each other.)

Sully: That bastard.

(Sam comes down to their end of the bar. .)

Same: There you boys go. Want me to run a tab for you?

Sully: That won’t be necessary.

(Sully grabs one of the pints and bashes it against Sam’s head. Blood starts gushing out of his head as he falls to the floor. Mickey
and Sully jump the bar and start going to work on Sam. Kicking his body over and over, until the door opens and Norm walks in.)

Norm: What the hell is going on?

Mickey: This guy Sam Malone used to pitch for the Soxs….

Norm: I know who that bastard is.

(Norm lumbers onto a bar stool and then finally onto the bar. He jumps off the bar onto Sam Malone. The sound of cracked bones is heard… The scene fades out.)

The first episode would have been the last episode as Sammy Malone would have been in a coma forever after.

3) Charles in Charge- I don’t even remember the name of Nicole Eggerts character in the show but Charles would have been sleeping with her within two months or at least one of her friends.

a. First of all he is Scott Fucking Baio… I mean would any chick be able to resist his manly charm? Nope. His name maybe Charles and yeah it is a character but it is Scott Fucking Baio… Would could resist this? His pimp hand is way strong.

b. He is a college student working at the house and going to school full time, something would have to give. You can’t tell me the mom and grandfather didn’t go away one weekend and the girls had a sleep over and someone smuggled in a bottle of liquor. At some point they were doing body shots of Charles leading to a massive orgy…. It just HAD to happen.

4) Friends- This is rather simple.

Someone would have killed Monica, poked out her eyes and skull fucked her. She is that annoying.

5) My Two Dads- Yeah, two guys sharing responsibility for a kid that may or not be theirs. No really I do see it happening. Wait let me
amend that first sentence. Two single guys living in New York sharing responsibility for a kid that may or not be theirs. Are you fucking
kidding me? They would both be running so fast to the doctors for a paternity test that they would leave burnout marks from where they were standing. Plus there was no way the artist guy was heterosexual. The kitschy half car couch… Come on now.

I have entirely way to much time to think about this shit… wow…

So what do you think was the least realistic TV Show of all time?