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An Ode to Big Amanda

By: Bobby Finstock on 10/26/06 @ 6:47 am

The second car I ever owned was a 1980 Monte Carlo. My first car, a crappy ass Cavalier that I had purchased for $750 had a major oil leak and me being the dumb high schooler I was decided to see how important oil really was in the up keep of an automobile. (Just for future reference it is rather important.) After an engine seizure and a lecture on how stupid I was it was time to move on.

I needed a car to still get around so my dad landed me a 1980 Monte Carlo that was pretty close to the end of it’s life. (I think he traded some beads for it maybe a shiny rock.)

monte carlo

(Note: it was nowhere near the condition of this one… the shitty blue color was the same)

This car was the single greatest car I have ever owned. Here are the reasons why:

1) The Nickname- My friend Jerry was dating a girl named Amanda at the time. Since she had a fat ass and my car had a fat ass, the name was an easy fit. We called my car big Amanda… Of course I think we ended up causing Jerry’s girlfriend to start an eating disorder but that is not important.

2) Three wheel motion- Back when I was in high school Dr. Dre and Snoop had just hit the scene. Living in the middle of nowhere in Western NY we didn’t have people rolling in cars hitting the three wheel motion. The shocks were so bad on my car it rode and looked like it had hydraulics. So when all my friends and I would ride to our summer league baseball games we felt all gangster, to quote the Outsiders we were “tuff”.

3) The decor-
The lining on the ceiling of the car was always falling down. To combat that my friends and I poked holes in the lining and when we were finished chewing a piece of gum we would stick it in the hole and punch the ceiling. If that isn’t classy and creative I don’t know what it.

4) The stories- Big Amanda was the catalyst in what was possibly the worst high school group outing ever. Which is the story I will tell tomorrow the title: “Sometimes the wheels go round and round and sometimes they fall off”

What was the worst car you ever owned? Or what was your favorite nickname of a car?

Filed in: My Life

About the author

Bobby Finstock

Finstock is founder of Pointlessbanter.net. He is known for his encyclopedia like knowledge on the life and times of Scott Baio. In the future he hopes to write again under his own name in order to impress the ladies and build his celebrity to the levels of other failed internet writers.

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