Chicks with Huge Boobs and Tiny Waists: A Worldwide Epidemic
What the hell is going on? In the past few years, I’ve noticed a trend: there are more and more superthin girls with mammoth mammaries.
C’mon, you know what I’m talking about. These are broads who are so skinny that they are practically curveless, and yet their pendulous breasts are ginormous! And I’m not talking about fake ones either. These are 100% Natural, Grade A Baby Feeders.
Get your Mind out of the gutter! I just thought a picture of some balloons would look nifty on here!
I’m tellin you, they’re everywhere (not that I’ve noticed. I have a friend who told me about them). And there’s more and more of them every year, which begs the questions:
1. Where the hell were they when I was in my late teens and early twenties?? I seem to remember there being a lot more doughy chicks with concave teats walking around my college campus than there were scrawny girls with Double Fs.
2. Does this mean that the makers of Barbie will now re-mold her into a plump, curvy woman with no breasts? Ya know, just to fuck with women’s minds some more?
3. Why did I get married so young?
Now I’m not sure what’s behind the boom of these genetic freaks, but I have a few ideas, and I’m hoping you do too.
- The 5 dudes that own all of the major food companies banded together and spent billions on researching a chemical food additive that would genetically alter all of Femdom.
- God is messing with me.
- It’s Darwinism at work. “Survival of the fittest” indeed.
- It’s a Global Warming-related illusion, similar to a mirage, caused by the Super-hot rays of the sun.
- I’m just so pent up after 12 years with the same woman that I’m starting to lose my marbles…just a little.
What about you guys? Have you noticed this trend or am I just a horny old man? What do you think is causing it? Girls: is there a male equivalent to this genetic alteration?
[Comment ID #3449 Will Be Quoted Here]
These are REAL ones I’m seein. That’s what so amazing! It’s a freak of nature i’m telling you
[Comment ID #3452 Will Be Quoted Here]
it’s definitely global warming
Huh? Oh sorry, I was busy looking at those balloons. They’re a wonderful addition to the blog for some unknown reason. I’m going back to stare at them some more.
Um, yeah, it’s all the hormones in the foods that we eat. Also responsible for people being taller and taller.
The rest of them are like that because they actually have really good implants. Seriously, and they’re getting them younger and younger these days.
Sorry man, I just notice the huge knockers, and I’m too busy staring at the gigantic bosoms to notice the waste. Or the face. Oh my, what if I’m checking out men with huge boobs and I don’t even know it!
[Comment ID #3476 Will Be Quoted Here]
It’s the nipples that make them so mezmerizing
[Comment ID #3480 Will Be Quoted Here]
Someone needs to invent some implants that go in when they’re fetuses and then just continue growing as they get older.
That was really creepy, wasn’t it?
[Comment ID #3481 Will Be Quoted Here]
shouldn’t you be checking out dudes’ packages insyead?
[Comment ID #3486 Will Be Quoted Here]
Yeah…that was really creepy. I don’t know. I think small boobies are nice. My mother always tells me that I’ll never be saggy. I’ll be perky even when I’m 80! Now, think about that one.
[Comment ID #3487 Will Be Quoted Here]
I meant to quote this one. Pardon me, I’m blonde.
Lypoooooo. I have huge tits && a huge ass to match, but not a tiny waist. That would just look unnatural.
[Comment ID #3489 Will Be Quoted Here]
yeah. my wife’s boobs are kinda small and they look better now than ever before!
[Comment ID #3490 Will Be Quoted Here]
you are banned from my blog
[Comment ID #3491 Will Be Quoted Here]
yeah, that’s exactly what I look like
I just think the fake ones look good now and girls are getting them for their sweet 16 and high school graduation. Don’t you watch Dr. 90210???
I dunno. I definitely agree that the hormones that they use in the livestock is a factor. I noticed in one of my sisters when she was going through a phase where she drank nothing but milk for at least a freaking year that her boobs looked like they were begining to develop and she was very young. I think there may be something in soy as well though. When I first stopped breastfeeding my son I was swapping around formulas and testing them on him for about a week (mostly because I just had that many free samples laying around) and I gave him soy formula and he looked like he was getting boobage so I took him off it immediately and they disappeared in about a week. I think it’s probably all of the additives piling up in our bodies and mutating us or whatever (attack of the mutant titties!). But, on the other hand, I don’t mind seeing a chick with a nice set of knockers either so I’m not going to voice too much of a complaint. Besides, the more big titty women there are out there, the more availible nice bras are for us.
I think it’s actually the terrorists. They know how obsessed the american male is with breasts. And they plan to create the new woman one by one, so eventually all you’ll see is huge boobs, and that’s when they will take over. It’s the axis of evil I tell you!
No, strike that… it’s actually us, the women. We are taking growth hormones willingly. I’m still waiting for my growth hormones to kick in! Us women know how obsessed you men are with boobs, so that one day we plan to strike. Can’t tell you when there’s a women’s code of ethics here… but we will strike in a day of booby exposure. All the women everywhere will come out shirtless and braless and then when you guys are good and distracted we will take over the world…. It’ll be fun, I can’t wait!
[Comment ID #3501 Will Be Quoted Here]
a new born (or nearly so) baby boy having boobies is a natural occuring thing actually. My son did as well and he was only breast fed. My doctor warned me that it would look like he was getting boobies, it is just the hormone exchange from the mother while pregnant left in his system… after a bit it fades and no more baby boobies.
[Comment ID #3509 Will Be Quoted Here]
I think this is the one I meant to quote… dangit!
a new born (or nearly so) baby boy having boobies is a natural occuring thing actually. My son did as well and he was only breast fed. My doctor warned me that it would look like he was getting boobies, it is just the hormone exchange from the mother while pregnant left in his system… after a bit it fades and no more baby boobies.
[Comment ID #3458 Will Be Quoted Here]
I said take a NOTE of their breast size…you don’t have to say what the tick in the box marked “humungous” means.
“Girls: is there a male equivalent to this genetic alteration?”
Yes…and it’s me, Donk!
I think it has to do with having enough to eat all the time. In nature if food is plentiful the animals come into breeding age quicker and the visual cues are brighter and bigger.
[Comment ID #3501 Will Be Quoted Here]
Ain’t that the show with Tori Spelling?
[Comment ID #3509 Will Be Quoted Here]
I’m putting my wife on a strict soy diet as of tomorrow
[Comment ID #3510 Will Be Quoted Here]
I think you’re on to something with the terrorist theory…
[Comment ID #3511 Will Be Quoted Here]
Never heard that before. That’s wacky stuff!
[Comment ID #3516 Will Be Quoted Here]
Are you saying you have a huge rod? Call me
[Comment ID #3517 Will Be Quoted Here]
Nah, that sounds to logical and sciency and stuff.
WTF, dude. No photographic evidence to support your theory? Guess I got that new 2 GB flash drive for nothing….