W.W.S.V.C.T.M.D?

What Would Someone Vastly Cooler Than Me Do?

I ask this question to myself on a daily basis when situations arise that I could have handled differently.

For example:

The other day I was walking to class when I was accosted by someone from the student government asking me if I had “registered to vote at my current address?” Something simple enough but I entered and exited the building about four times in half an hour and was asked all four times, on one trip out of the building one of the girls like ran me down because I didn’t hear her question. Each time I gave the same answer a simple, “Yes, thanks.”

For rest of the afternoon this situation weighed heavily on me. Not because it was important but because I pissed away a golden opportunity to say something funny. So I had to ask myself the question what would someone vastly cooler than me do?

The suave response:

“Should I just register to vote at your address because I see myself sleeping over there a lot in the future.”

Pro: I might get laid.

Con: I might get a visit from sexual harassment panda.

The self deprecating response:

“Look at how old I am, I use to wear an ‘I like Ike button’ to high school.”

Pro: People think it is funny when you make of yourself.

Con: About one in five people would get the Eisenhower reference and even if they did get it isn’t all that funny.

The let’s confuse them response:

“Voting, you mean like on American Idol?”

Pro: It is a great social commentary on the apathy of the American public when it comes to voting.

Con: If taken literally I will look like the biggest idiot ever. Or just get lumped in with these people:

The crackpot response:

“Voting? Voting? You think our vote counts? The government is run by multi-national corporations that inject us with tracking devices when we get inoculated as a child. Then they watch our every move so they now how to market to us, control us, and manipulate us. In fact sometimes they pose as aliens to run tests on us, they abducted me last week and gave me multiple anal probes. I have said too much, they are watching us right now!”

Pro: I might scare the shit out of her and she could piss herself.

Con: Really is their a con to this?

So I ask you what would be a better response to:

“Are you registered to vote at your current address?”