Is this Karma or just funny?

(I wasn’t going to write anything today but I thought of this little nugget the other day and I figure it was a good life lesson for everyone to learn.)

When I was going to school at Albany and living with my friend Dennis I used to hang out with his old high school friends from North of Albany. They used to go out all the time and I would show up and have a few beers with them, all good guys, it was never a bad time. In their little group of friends was a girl they nick named Fi. Nobody in the group had ever dated Fi she was considered a sister in a lot of their minds, until I came along and destroyed that whole thing.

Fi and I started hooking up after long nights of drinking. In fact I don’t think I have ever been around her without at least having four beers in me. The problem was that this group of people we hung out with drank to a point where everyone was almost blacked out drunk. There was no happy medium with any of these people. It was actually a tad scary because I was at my peak drinking wise in my young life and sometimes I couldn’t keep up with these people.

So whenever Fi and I hooked up I was usually at the verge of either:
a) death
b) blackout
c) me swearing off drinking forever

Because of my condition it brought about my first ever sexual dysfunction. Well I wouldn’t call it a sexual dysfunction. It was more me passing out in the middle of the act.

For the first 22 years of my life that never had happened, so this was new to me. Needless to say this didn’t go over well with Fi. The first time it happened she was a little upset but we laughed it off the next day. Now the second time it happened I got a slap in the face for it. As for the third time needless to say I was cut off at this point.

I figured the situation would never be spoken about but apparently Dennis had either talked to her or overheard a conversation and decided to share this with everyone how I fell asleep on her. It was more about making fun of her than me. Fi though didn’t take like this very much and decided to plot her revenge by sleeping with my housemate Dennis. She made sure to this on a night where I was home with the flu so I could hear everything.

Vindictive, cunning, and slightly bitchy her plan was in full effect. When they came into the house she was rather vocal and made sure it was known that she was there to have sex with Dennis. Sadly, for her, it blew up in her face when drunken Dennis was unable to achieve or maintain an erection (I wasn’t sure which it was because I wasn’t in the room obviously). It ended with the following conversation.

Fi: Are you kidding me? You can’t even get it up?
Dennis: I’m really drunk sorry.
Fi: I hate this fucking house… I HATE BOTH OF YOU.
Dennis: Where are you going? Just give me a minute…
Fi: Screw this I am walking home at least I have a vibrator at home.

The door slammed and Dennis knocked on my door to apologize for bringing her home to hook up with her. He was blasted… I was laughing, it was all good.

So I have two questions:

1) Was this Karma or just a funny situation?
2) How much do you want to make a bed the batteries dies on her vibrator when she got home?

Have a great weekend everyone.

(Remember to watch the pointless banter show Sunday night at 8pm on Musicplustv.com with our special guest Nick Thune. If you live in the LA area make sure to check out Phil Varone’s show at the Improv this Saturday night. For more info click here.)