The greatest poem ever
I hate poetry.
Not because I think it is dumb but because I am. I just don’t understand it. I can’t tell what is good and what is pure shit.
I get invited to like 10 poetry blogs a day and I will go and just sit there and stare at it. Not knowing if it is Walt Whitman or a 12 year old.
Yesterday though I was so moved that I have decided to write my first poem. There is a redhead girl that I see all the time when I leave one of my classes. She leaves her class at the same time and we are always going different directions. I think she might be the hottest girl ever on the face of the planet. So this is my poem to her:
(note: this redheaded girl isn’t nearly as hot as the real redhead girl)
Ode to the Redhead Girl
Hey Redhead Girl
I see you after class
I want you to know I think you are a total piece of ass
FIRE CROTCH
Hey Redhead Girl
My arm brushed against yours on a previous date
I now think about it when I masturbate
SPANK BANK
Hey Redhead Girl
One day I will get the time to talk to you
And hopefully you will tell your friends about the cool guy you blew
THIS FRIDAY NIGHT
Hey Redhead Girl
I really hope you don’t think I am a stalker
Even though I hope you need a walker
AFTER I DISPLACE YOUR HIP FROM AWESOME SEX
I think I should hand write this and hand it to her with my phone number on the bottom.
It would be super romantic right?
lmao!
Hey Kevin,
Your poetry’s so awesome
I think I’m in heaven.
[...] Now I took a shot at writing poetry this fall and I don’t think it is at the level they would want. If you want to read that failure you can see it here. Looking at my blogs I would hardly consider them quality prose, I don’t think a blog would translate in this medium very well. So I have decided to branch out and write my first piece of erotic fiction from a guy’s point of view, I hope you all enjoy this. This is the just the opening to it… [...]
This is “Freaking” Awesome!!! I def think you should hand it over with your number at the bottom!!!
romantically intriguing
I can totally see you rubbin one off while writing this…I know I was while I was reading it.
And here I thought you were sexually repressed.
Please tell me you did not give this to “Fire Crotch”! and if you did i am sure to bet you have a restraining order out on you! haha