Scoreboard-Kevin Smith, The English and others
On Monday when I wrote my blog about things I don’t get I had more than one comment from a Southerner about my crack about how their twang makes them sound dumb. It was a joke and I didn’t really mean to offend anyone because I am sure there are smart Southerners like, uh, George Washington Carver, that guy could do anything with a peanut. Still people were offended over a dumb joke and the more I thought about it the less I felt bad because being a northerner I have “scoreboard” over a southerner.
Scoreboard is a phrase from the Jim Rome sports talks radio show, that is where I first heard the term years ago and should give the show credit. Here is the definition from http://www.jimrome.com.
Scoreboard- (interjection) ‘The final score negates your argument’ [used as a rebuttal to postgame complaints of bad luck, poor officiating, etc.]
So southerners let me remind you.
The Civil War
North-1
South-0
Scoreboard bitches! I can say whatever I want about your slack jawed yokel twang. This got me thinking though who else do I have scoreboard over? So below is my list of people I have scoreboard over.
Who: England
Why: Revolutionary War and the fact you would be speaking German if it weren’t for us.
Scoreboard
United States-2
England-0
Who: Lesbians
Why: I inadvertently turned two girls to your side. So I helped bolster your ranks, thus I can talk shit.
Scoreboard
Me-2
Lesbians-0
Who: Forbidden
Why: There is nothing fake about these bad boys.
Scoreboard
Me-1
Forbidden-0
Who: Kevin Smith
Why: He has the 6th ranked movie in America and I have the 3rd most watched show on musicplustv.com with Trista. Third is better than sixth, thus I have scoreboard. Because I have scoreboard I am demanding you come on my show as a guest. It’s in LA, airs live Sunday Nights at 8… I know you have nothing to do. Call my people and we will set something up.
Scoreboard
Me-1
Kevin Smith-0
Who: The Family Cat
Why: I feed you. Without me you don’t live.
Scoreboard
Me-1
Tabitha-0
Jim J Bullock
Why: Because…
Scoreboard
Me-1
Jim J. Bullock-0
Who: Midget Basketball Players
Why: I’ve got game and two feet on you.
Scoreboard
Me-2ft
Midget Basketball Players-0
Who do you have scoreboard over and why?
actually it’s
United States – 3
England – 0
the war of 1812. even though the British did burn down the white house we still kicked their butts.