"Maybe it was a dream, you know, a very weird, bizarre, vivid, erotic, wet,
detailed dream. Maybe we have malaria."

Aug
24

I Think I Want To Be A Female Cam Whore

By: Bobby Finstock on 08/24/05 @ 10:27 pm

Lately I have done a lot of thinking and I have reevaluated what I want to do with my life. For awhile I had my heart set on becoming the next rock, paper, and scissors world champion… but I no longer have the desire. I have decided as of last week that I want to become a cam whore.

I know… I know there are so many people saying, “You can’t be a cam whore.”

I have heard all the arguments…

“Kevin you aren’t a barely legal teenage girl how would visit your site?” I think if I listen to enough crappy pop songs that I could transfer into a barely legal teenage girl. The county fair is in town maybe I could find a Zoltaire machine… (if you get that reference you are my new best friend)

“Kevin your breasts aren’t big enough!” It is all about camera angles, you can make a cups look like c’s with the right lighting.

“Why would you want to be a cam whore they are the lowest form of internet scum?” I know that but think about working about 4-6 hours a day and raking in a ton of money while perverts watch you do the most banal things. I mean… I could cut my toenails for like half an hour and make a ton of money… It boggles my mind.

“Dude guys will be checking you out don’t you find that rather gay?” I go with the ostrich theory, what I don’t see can’t hurt me.

So in closing I am going to set out today on a mission to become a cam whore. Which means spamming myspace with crappy profiles… Posting messages on forums asking you to check out my profile…. And taking pictures with a pouting face, partially naked, and a random ass shot…

Ok … I am way to bored at work….

Filed in: My Life

About the author

Bobby Finstock

Finstock is founder of Pointlessbanter.net. He is known for his encyclopedia like knowledge on the life and times of Scott Baio. In the future he hopes to write again under his own name in order to impress the ladies and build his celebrity to the levels of other failed internet writers.

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