My Christmas List
My Christmas List:
-A Wayne Rooney Manchester United Jersey … the away version
-The Indiana Jones DVD Box Set
-The Nirvana Box Set
-There is a press release stating the Paris Hilton has scurvy.
-A hula girl for my dashboard like Tom Hanks had in Bachelor Party.
-Official Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle!
-World Peace… eh fuck it that is a wasted item
-A knee injury for Kobe Bryant so he has to stay at home and listen to his wife nag the fuck out of him.
Kobe: Honey could you have someone make me a sandwich I am really hungry?
Mrs. Bryant: Fuck you how many more were there?
Kobe: Oh honey just the one.
Mrs. Bryant: (Jumping up and down on his knee) HOW MANY MORE…
Ah yuletides cheer.
-A comeback by Scott Baio
-A contract extension for more records by Jessica Simpson so I can ignore her even more.
-For someone to finally make the Knight Rider Movie. Complete with the villain being the evil David Hasselhoff with the mustache and everything.
-For someone to explain to me why they think “Lost in Translation” was any good.
-To not have a Wednesday night class so I can watch “Lost” rest of the season.
-For that rash on my… oh wait never mind
-To see “Life Aquatic”
-For a massage by two blonde Swedish model…. Oh wait, that is my fantasy list…. Ignore that.
-For people that drive slow on the freeway to drive in the right hand lane like they are supposed to
-Mr Show season four so I can watch the skit about “Taint Magazine”….. which spawned the line
“That guy has a six inch taint”
Guess you had to be there
So start shopping now… I always take cash well…
I feel like one of those like web cam sluts or like BDSM chicks that are list like demands of what they want. The shoe is on the other foot whooo hooo
